Funny mikie should ask for a Ronald story...

Because just before I got settled in our comfortable

Holiday Inn in Nashville Tennessee,

I was teasing Ronnie that I was going to be blogging

about the wild hotel adventure he put us on today.

Then I see Mikie's request.

Well, get a good cold beer and sit back and listen to this one:

I LEFT THE PLANNING OF THIS TRIP ALL UP

TO THE RONALD RIERA HIMSELF.

HE IS GOOD AT BOOKING FLIGHTS

HE LIKES LOOKING UP ALL THE INFORMATION

NEEDED ABOUT A CERTAIN AREA

AND SO I TRUSTED HIM.

I DON'T NEED A FANCY HOTEL SO I AM NOT

REALLY PARTICULAR ON WHERE WE STAY

SO I NEVER QUESTIONED WHERE WE MIGHT BE STAYING.

HOWEVER I SHOULD HAVE, FROM HISTORY

I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN HIS FAMOUS WORDS"

"DE PITURE LOOKED GOOD ON DE COMPUTER"

SO WE STOP TO ASK DIRECTIONS TO THE HOTEL

BECAUSE OF COURSE, WE CAN'T OWN A GORMAN...

THEY GENTLEMAN WHO WE ASK DIRECTIONS FROM

ASKS US WHERE WE ARE FROM, WE TELL HIM,

AND HE TELLS US THAT IS A ROUGH NEIGHBORHOOD.

WELL, THE ROOM IS ALREADY BOOKED AND RONALD,

WELL HE WON'T BACK DOWN FROM HIS 40 DOLLAR

NIGHT ROOMS.

WE PULL UP INTO THE MOTEL RIGHT BEHIND THE LIQUOR

STORE. THE ARABIAN MANAGER IS OH, SO NICE

AND LOOKS VERY EXCITED TO SEE US.

PROBABLY BECAUSE THERE ARE THREE CARS IN THE DRIVEWAY.

WE DRIVE RIGHT UP TO OUR DOOR,

JUST LIKE A CUTE LITTLE BUNGALOW,

THAT SMELLS LIKE A BAR ROOM THAT GOT DOUSED

IN PERFUME TO COVER THE SMELL.

I AM TRYING TO KEEP MY THOUGHTS TO MYSELF

WHICH WERE:

THERE AIN'T NO WAY IN HELL I AM SPENDING THE NIGHT HERE.

HOWEVER, THE WAY WITH RONALD IS YOU HAVE

TO LET HIM COME TO THIS CONCLUSION HIMSELF.

"THIS ROOM IS NOT SO BAD" HE SAYS.

I SAY, "RONNIE, THERE IS NO TUB!!!!"

THERE IS NO BLOW DRYER AND THE BLANKET HAS

MARIJUANA SEED BURN HOLES IN IT.

I FIND THE REMOTE CONTROL FOR THE TV

BUT YOU REALLY DON'T NEED IT BECAUSE

IF YOU JUST SIT UP IN BED, THE TV IS RIGHT THERE.

NO NEED FOR BOOKS SINCE THERE IS NO READING LIGHT...

RON GOES OUTSIDE TO CHECK THE CAR

AND I CAN TELL HIS FEELINGS ABOUT THE ROOM HAS CHANGED.

WE LEAVE TO GO EAT AND HE SAYS TO ME

"IF YOU DON'T WANT TO STAY THERE WE CAN FIND

ANOTHER PLACE"

I TELL HIM I'M GLAD HE SAID THAT BECAUSE THERE

WAS NO WAY I WAS SLEEPING THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE.

YES, HE HAS CHANGED HIS MIND BECAUSE

THE MANAGER SEES HIM OUTSIDE AND BEGINS

TELLING HIM HOW THE ECONOMY IS SO BAD THAT

HE JUST GOT THIS JOB MANAGING BUT THAT

WE DON'T WANT TO GO TO THE PLACE NEXT DOOR

BECAUSE IT IS VERY DANGEROUS.

HE THEN DECIDES TO CHECK THE WRITE-UPS ON

THE HOTEL AND SEES THAT PEOPLE SAY IT

WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SO BAD IF IT WEREN'T

FOR THE BULLET HOLES IN THE WINDOWS....

YES, WE MUST LEAVE.

THE NICE MANAGER IS SORRY TO SEE US GO

BUT OF COURSE HE UNDERSTANDS WHEN

I TELL HIM THAT THEY WERE EXCEPTIONALLY NICE

BUT I AM AFRAID FOR THE AREA, NEED A BATHTUB

AND A BLOW DRYER.

HIS PARTNER THEN INFORMS US THAT HE UNDERSTANDS,

THEIR PARKING LOT IS SAFE BUT EVERYTHING

ELSE IS PRETTY DANGEROUS.

YES, THIS WONDERFUL BARGAIN PLACE FROM A MAN

WHO DIDN'T HESITATE TO DUMP 300 DOLLARS

AT THE CASINO LAST NIGHT.

Now you know I always tease Ronnie on being so cheap

but really I think it is more so he can tell people

what a deal he made, this one won't be one he brags about

I can assure you that!!!!

So, now we are at the most wonderful Holiday Inn express,

comfortable and waiting

to watch the Saints game.

The Ronald Riera has lost his rights on finding hotel rooms

from now on!!!!

Always a story to tell when hanging out with this

man of mines.