When I grow up I want to be a....

COUGAR!!!!!!!

On Friday on of our Para's once again brings home-baked

treats to school and waves them in front of my nose.

I tell her that I will never be a cougar at the rate I am going.

Huhh, some of the staff asks?

Yes, I tell them when I grow up I want to be a cougar

so I am trying to loose a few pounds to achieve my goal.

There are some electricians in ear view of this conversation

and they are laughing, laughing hard I might add.

I don't know if they were laughing because they

thought I was being cute or if they know

"THAT'LL NEVER HAPPEN"

One of our speech teachers tell me I may already

be one, depends on the type of cubs I'm trying

to attract.

I tell her, shoot I don't want to attract any cubs,

heck I have a tiger at home, why would I want cubs?

I just want to look like one.

Well, at my school Christmas party it is the joke that

spreads around the room.

Some tell me I already am a cougar,

others... well they tell me to just eat,

I'll never make it.

Still I continue on my journey

to make it to cougarhood.

I can tell you however, that cougar or not,

I know how to have a good time.

So, when the band took a break and began

playing 12 days of Christmas

I just had to go up to that mike

and get my two pals,

Mel my date for the night

and Jenny one of or kn. teachers

to sing with me.

What did I learn?

I do not know the 12 days of Christmas

but I do know 5 on down.

That if you give me a chance to

hold a microphone, I will perform

and no, I did not drink,

not one little drop.