what to do, what to do...

Want to blog this now while all I have heard

today from Dr. Marino is fresh in my mind.

I also want to apologize to any blog followers

that may be bored with all this medical mumbo-jumbo.

Yet, when I decided to share all of this it is also

for the reason that one day, someone may need to hear

about these struggles and will gain answers, inspiration

from this journey my life has been.

So If you are bored, I give you permission to move on...

After much study and discussion of all my past surgical

and medical issues, after reviewing my CT scan of the

last partial bowel obstruction I had Dr. Marino decides

that he feels confidant that he and Dr. Donner can

proceed with attempting to fix this Pars defect of

the spine by going through the abdomen.

I share with him all my fears about the bowel issues

I have had and he lays it on the line.

Doesn't tell me anything I don't know already.

There are no guarantees and I could have bowel problems

but he promised that if he makes that initial incision

and it looks as though this will become a major

surgery he will close me up and not proceed with the back surgery.

It is what I wanted to hear. He has my confidence.

He feels encouraged because the back problem is fixed from

the left side and I have no issues from the left side.

However I do have my only kidney and ureter on

the left side and although the kidney will not be

involved, the ureter will have to be moved aside.

Now I have to go and see My pal and family doctor,

Camille Pitre to get her input then back to see Dr. Donner

to ask more questions I have then it seems like I

am going to go ahead with this last chance for

having the quality of life I want.

I am encouraged, I am scared.

They have told me that the initial pain will be bad

but they will help me with that. As most surgeries

there are no guarantees. There is that risk that the surgery will

not be able to be done or that the pain will not be relieved

but I have belief that this surgery will give me a life again.

That I will return to work better than now and be able

to continue to work in a field I have loved from

the very first day I started at the young age

of 18. Pray for me, pray for the doctors,

pray for God's will as I move on into this

scary world of back surgery.