unwarranted fears

I often worry about the time I spend with the Bean.

I worry about whether or not I will be remembered by her,

I worry about whether I am spending enough time with her,

I worry about whether she will understand just how much I love her.

Last night, when we went to see her, I wondered whether

she would cry not to come with me.

When we walked in last night she was standing and playing

with her big cousin, Maddy and the minute she saw me,

She squinted those beautiful little eyes and smiled big

and began trying to walk towards me while holding Maddie's hands.

Oh how happy and excited this made me.

We played a lot and she even cracked some smiles to her Pappy

who she gets to see even less.

She is beginning to understand her Pappy.

Then there was a time that she was beginning to get tired.

She climbed right into my lap and put her head on my shoulder,

wanted to cuddle with me and I swear a part of my heart melted

right there.... Oh I love her wayyyyy tooooo muucccchhh!!!!!!!