I am not made to have this much time off

There were summers that I would have killed to be off

all summer with my babies.

Yet at that time, hospitals and doctors offices

did not shut down for summer vacation.

Now I have this dream job that gives me so much time off

and after 4 weeks of summertime,

I am ready to go back to work.

Mentally that is, not physically.

The nasty weather could have something to do with

my bored mood but I find myself

very frustrated with all I am not doing,

all that I physically seem not to be able to do.

I really was bargaining for the fact that summer

would be great for me, take away all my back pains.

I even made a list of all I wanted to accomplish this summer.

Few things have been scratched off that list.

Hardest thing for me to accept is the time I have not been

able to spend with the kiddies in my life.

Having to come to the acceptance and realization

that some things have to change has not been easy for me

these last few weeks.

I am fearful for the beginning of school this year also.

Very afraid that I just will not be able to physically do the job.

However, I am in a better mental state when I do go to work.

If nothing else, if I get through one day of work,

I feel like I have accomplished something

and it is enough.

Just thoughts coming into my head this morning after

being awake another morning way too early for

summer thanks to this wonderful back I have been blessed with.

Thankful that today I have at least some things to do

that cannot be cancelled,

dentist and haircut.

Have a good one I am praying for sun even if it comes

with temperatures in the 100's!

(picture above used with verbal permission of the cuties' daddy)