St. Joseph manor visit

I know I probably blog too much about visiting my Mommy 

at the manor. Shoot, I probably blog too much about bringing

Bean there to visit. Yet, something magical happens when 

i visit there with her.

As I said before, It is important to me that Bean have memories

of my Mommy so I try and bring her often.

There is something about the Bean though that makes her visits

even more special, magical.

Bean is a friendly child, loves people and loves talking.

I always make it a point to go into the dining room with her at coffee time.

There, the elderly come to congregate  and when they see a child,

they light up. When the encounter a child like Bean

it makes their day, puts smiles and giggles in their afternoon.

Such is this day. 

I let her take her little baby with its bed and comb to each table

and explain in her "Jilly Language" about her baby.

They loved it and so does she.

If you have young ones, take them to visit our elderly,

it will make your heart happy just to see these two generations

mix. I am so glad I get to witness the transformation each time.

 Going to share some pictures of the day.

I have the cutest little video of Mommy singing to bean

and bean just mesmerized by it but it just won't load

and I am sad because I so wanted to share the sweet moment with you all.

Above picture is bean waking up from her nap at mommee's.

she loved her nap there, rocked with mommee until she fell

asleep then made it to Mommee's bed.

After the nap we sat outside the beautiful grounds of

St. Joseph manor and waiting Rebecca who came for coffee with us.

Somewhere in this little girls heart and head will be memories

of such a beautiful place spent with such a beautiful woman.

She won't know the old mommee, the one we remember prior to dementia,

but her memories will be just as sweet when thinking of her

great grandmother who played babies with her.

Happy weekend to all.....

staying in today, nasty weather. 

Late Effects

Our new friend will become Anna's Endocrinologist. This is due to the amount of chemo and radiation her little body has endured. Unfortunately, her life without medicine will be short lived. Once the late term side effects kick in, she will be on medicines for the rest of her life. On the bright side, clinic appts. and testing are now down to 1 time per 

That above few sentences is thankfully, from the blog

of sweet Anna, the little girl I have spoken about a few times

last year who was battling cancer.

She, today is celebrating her first year anniversary of

having received her stem cell transplant and another month of NED

better known in the cancer world as 

NO EVIDENCE OF DISEASE,

GO, ANNA BANANA.

Why, you may be asking, have I picked these few sentences to 

share with my bloggers?

It is with great excitement that the children who have cancer in today's

world are seen and treated for the term, Late term side effects.

Back in my day there was dead or alive, treatment was given 

with no regards as to whether or not you would survive.

It focused on the survival part and for that I am grateful.

However, there is that other part of me who feels alone sometimes

in the world. There are no doctors out there who can explain to me

what radiation and chemotherapy has done to my body and yet

each tell me I am fortunate because one, I am alive,

and two my symptoms that I suffer still allow me a normal life.

They are hidden from the world.

For those things I am grateful. 

Even on the WWW it is hard to find many who are still here

today who had radiation back in the day before it was monitored.

I feel guilty many days because I have pain that cannot be explained 

to anyone and feel like I should just suck it up.

I feel guilty on the days that I just can't get anything accomplished

and just want to lay down and read all day.

It makes me feel lazy and that is something that I never have been.

The older I get, the more I feel the effects of the radiation I have had.

So happy for dear sweet Anna and her future and all the children

who are in her category of 

Childhood cancer survivors. So happy that when they get to be

my age, as I pray they will, all will be understood as to the price

we cancer survivors pay for life.

And yet, it is all worth it. I am thankful that I am doing so well.

I am thankful that I was able to give 30 years to a career that

really was a passion. I am thankful for the two children who were not

supposed to be. I am extremely happy about the Bean.

I pray daily for acceptance of myself for it is I who is the hardest on myself.

Happy Thursday! 

Bean and I heading to Thibby to see the Mommy!

Ahhhhh... post anesthesia sleeping

Yep, yesterday was  my every three year colonoscopy

so spent the day in bed sleeping off the after effects of anesthesia.

oh, not gunna lie, that anesthesia sleep-off is the best.

For a whole day, all you are expected to do is sleep.

I did that like the best of them.

Today, today, back to the real world and it's going to be

a good day in the real world as Bean coming to spend

the afternoon with me. 

Our house is being painted today so not much can be done outside.

Think me and the Bean will make a quick trip to Baton Rouge,

look at the craft stores.....

Love taking her places as she loves to shop.

Shades of Grey finale"

I did it! I completed all three books of

SHADES OF GREY

It was hard...... to finish I mean.

After the first one, aside from all the sex stuff,

I really was intrigued with the story.

By the middle of the second book and for sure

through the last one I had to force myself to complete it.

If you reading the books and don't want to know the end, 

stop reading the blog right now

##################################################

(GIVING TIME TO STOP READING)

 It is lots of words to have what every

family has.

They come into the relationship with each a history.

They meet and fall in love, have much sex, some kinky,

some regular love making.

They work on their relationship until each is comfortable

with the others past lives.

They get married, the have an unexpected baby,

He finally gets used to the idea and is happy,

they have a second child and they become the normal

family life. Isn't that what we all do aside from

the S and M sex that the book starts with?

I like to think I am a deeper reader than what this 

book has in it.

The first few sex explanations draws you in but by the third book

I just skim over those parts for the plot of the book.

Once you read the first few encounters, they all seem the same.

There are some good plots during the story line but

I had trouble finishing it. I can't say I am disappointed that I did.

Because I am an avid reader, I like to think

that I read all kinds of things

yet this is one trilogy that I will not repeat.

I like to say that I love reading, doesn't matter what it is.

I just don't think the author is a great writer, she is not the worst either.

Mediocre at best.

To say I will not see the movie is a lie.

To tell the truth, I think I will look forward to the movie

because I think it will make for a better movie than a book

and I want to see what a producer will do with such a book.

If you like a book filled with sex, this is your trilogy.

If you like a love story, probably not the ones to choose.

A day of a rare happening, the ones that make me the happiest

There are many things that are not explained when becoming a parent.

How often have you heard,

"Wish they would come with instruction books"

When in the heat of it, you think, it'll never end.

You think this during the good times, you think this through the bad times.

You do your best as a parent to make sure you teach them

what family means and being a sibling means.

Then it happens, they grow up and begin to live their own lives.

They still love each other and would do anything for the other

but their time together, their time with you becomes slimmer and slimmer.

It happened to me with my siblings, it happened to my

two babies, and believe me, it will happen to your babies.

So, when those days come that they are together again

under the same roof for no matter how long it is, 

you treasure it. You savor it. You watch them.

You watch them with the next generation as the proud daddy

explains to the Nannie all his little girl is, all she does.

You watch them catch up on the months that have passed 

since they were together.

Most importantly you realize, that just like you,

no matter how much time it is since you see your sibling,

they bond of growing up together is there and there 

are no words needed to explain the bond that will always be there.

None of us feel like we get enough time with 

gypsy baby, it's because she works a lot but also because

she is busy living her own life.

She is the baby, our baby and we want her to see us more

but we also understand that she is a grown woman now,

with a life outside of us. 

Yesterday was one of those rare days.

Yesterday I had my two babies together for the majority of the day.

We also had the added pleasure of KD getting away from 

work to have lunch with us.

We all played with Bean as she showed off for us and

especially her Nannie all those things she now can do.

When Baby boy was my only one and I wasn't sure

if I could have another, I prayed for a sibling for him.

I wanted him to have something in the way of family 

in case something happened to HOBL and I.

We were blessed with gypsy baby and she is so different

from all of us and it is those differences that makes us love her so much.

When in our presence, she becomes all of our baby again.

I know, after watching them, that even if they don't spend

the amount of time together that they once did,

they will always have each others back.

I know they irritate each other sometimes but that sibling bond,

has been instilled in them and when life gets bad for them,

they will call each other, they will always do for each other.

They will always enjoy their time together even if it isn't as often

as it once was.

After BB left with Bean to take his own nap with his own

baby and her Mommy,

me and gypsy baby headed to my bed for a nap together.

When we are together, she reverts back to my baby,

allows me to hug her, love her, pet her hair,

nap with her. I need this, so does she.

After we have been sleeping for an hour or so,

her daddy comes in to do his own loving on his baby girl.

She pushes him away, of course, but all the same,

she loves it, because even in HOBL's eyes, she is our baby.

I think she comes home sometimes just for this because

don't we all, sometime just need to be loved by your momma and daddy?

So you out there, with your little ones under toe,

with those sibling fights going on in your home, those that

you wish would just go away as you try and get them to 

understand that one day they will need each other,

enjoy it, bask in it.

Soon they will be gone and living their separate lives.

They will call you to complain about the other

and you will listen and try not to add any sentences to

their paragraph because you will know, that no doubt

about it, that when the time comes, they will

be there for each other, because you have taught them well.

Yesterday was a rare event in the the Riera home.

One that I will remember forever, not for the big stuff that didn't happen

but for the little things, the jokes, the sharing

that I were lucky to be a part of.

Love your babies.