Sunday, November 30, 2014


We probably have all had those days where
you  make plans with little ones you love and
at the last minute plans change.
Such was the case yesterday.
Down the bayou, my great niece, Abby, who
is a Tarponette was having a Frozen day at her school
for little kiddo's to raise money for the organization.
I have been talking of it for at least a month.
Made the plans to bring Bean and little Lillian
with me for a fun filled day of Princesses.
I was as excited as they were. 
On Friday, Baby boy asked if I wanted Bean to go sleep
but I had plans to meet a friend at the movies
(saw dumb and dumber 2, was funny!)
and to eat out. I told him I may get in too late as
we had also made plans to fight the mall for 
shopping. Well, that didn't happen.
I was praying, say this is not happening,
I came home by 6 because of nausea.
Ate only two pieces of sushi after I had been
bragging how good it was.
I laid in bed, praying,
"Please, please, please, don't let this be a virus,
don't let this stop me from bringing my girls
to their princess day....
I fell asleep after taking two Phenergan and
fell asleep. At about 9:30, there was no denying it.
Vomiting and diarrhea. 
Yeah I know kind of gross, graphic but ugh
why, why, why, this day? I have not been sick
for so long, could not this pick a better day?
I text baby boy to say I don't see where i can drive
with the two little girls this sick.
I knew it would make Bean so sad, I know she was looking
forward to it as again, we had been speaking of it.
I was right, Baby boy let me know she was crying when
he told her. I then called Minta to tell, Lillian.
She said she would be all right.
So besides that yesterday, even though the virus had
me feeling like I was run over by a mac truck,
I cried more for letting those little girls down
and for letting Abby down as she was so looking forward
to spending the day with them.
How can you make up such a day?
I don't think you can.
I am glad that little children tend to be more forgiving
than us big adults.
Today, I am feeling better, not 100percent but good
enough to finally shop, get dressed and see the girls 
if BB is home.
WE have all had these days, but does not make this one

Thursday, November 27, 2014


It's that day again, seems like it was just here...
yet here it is again,
the day we take time to relax and celebrate with the ones
we love, we give thanks for all our good things in our
world, our life. 
This has been on hell of a year for me and my babies
and yet, today, I am so very very thankful for the
way things are coming together for us all.
Ronnie and I are finding us getting past the shock 
of separation, to a place of being civil to now working on
being friends. I say this without meaning to put him down,
but it took us figuring out the marriage could not work to
find us both happy again. And I am happy. I won't lie,
there are days that nostalgia cloud my thinking, my eyes,
and I may shed a tear or two, but I look at our two
grown children and know, we were not perfect parents,
far from it, but we have raised two independent wonderful
adults who give back to society.
 Then there are the two grand babies, two beautiful little girls
who call me Mumsie.
I swear to this blog and all those I love,
I would give up everything to have these girls.
When Bean puts her arms around me when she
is almost asleep and in her sleepiness she says,
"I love you Mumsie" 
I feel all that is right in the world and there is a lot right.
There is a lot not right but today,
all is right.
 Then there is Tuts, oh our Tuts..
can any baby be more laid back, sweeter 
than our Tuts? Bean was the first, but Tuts
being second, well she is the type of baby that goes
with the flow. when I rock her to sleep and she slides
the same two fingers in her mouth from her left hand,
just like her Daddy, I am transformed back to a time,
29 years back when her Daddy did the same on the 
same shoulder. she is such a blessing.
 I am thankful for the days I get to see Bean and Tuts
together, playing. What Bean will do to entertain her
sister is amazing. I forget sometimes that she is just 
3 1/2, not 4 until March. She has the sense of most adults
and is so overprotective of "her baby"
While reading to her the other night, there was a little
girl in the book and she said,
"Mumsie, I wish she was my sister"
I explained that Tuts won't be little for much longer,
that soon she will be like her, a little girl just like
the little girl in the book.
"and we can sleep together?"
Yes, my sweet child, you and Tuts will spend many nights
sneaking into each others beds.
This reminded me of my own two. Every Christmas eve
until I think Baby boy was 16, he and Gypsy landed
up in each others beds, I often wonder the secrets they shared
on that special night. Maybe I should have made them
go into their own beds so they could fall asleep faster so 
Santa could come and Mommy could go to bed,
but I didn't. Because even then, I knew whatever they were
talking about was necessary for their relationship.
Today, they remain close as adults.
I am thankful I didn't interrupt those nights....
Last but not least, I am thankful for all
my friends and family, especially my sisters who have
gotten me through some rough patches this year.
I can't name them all and the good thing about true
friends and family, you don't have to repay them because
they and you all know that their time is coming that
they will need you and I will be here.
A special thanks that my besties are mines.
That my dear Ann has her Moody for hopefully many years
to come, that he overcame an illness that almost made my Ann
a widow.
and my Laurie.... I cannot even begin to explain what she has
been to me these last few months, not only does she listen
to all my single girl issues, but she gives good advice
and loves me no matter what. She shares her girls with me
and how I love those girls. 

Wednesday, November 26, 2014


Each year for the last 10, 
I have made my own Christmas cards. They
are lots of work and each year I think
I am going to do away with them and
just have them printed at Walmart but I just
can't do it. This year, I decided on a photo shoot
with the Tuts and Bean Saturday when we had
our sleepover. OH what an adventure:

 So I brought props, Bean loved that.
She helped me put up the little tree, picked out her
outfit and Tuts diaper cover.
She also picked out her hairstyle, which was 
No brush-wet braided then unbraided
 dry curly look.
She picked out Beans head band too.
Our first idea was to have them reading a book.
But in picture one, you see Bean really got into reading
the book and Tuts wanted to go to bed.
Oh-oh... maybe too close to her bedtime.
We persisted, Bean and I while Tuts went from her 
fingers to the book itself to eat.
 Then Bean tried to reason with tuts,
"Look at Mumsie"
as Tuts had other ideas, like bed....
 My second idea was to get tuts interested in pinecones.
"Mums that is not safe its going to pick her little belly"
No amount of reassuring that I was not going to let her
get hurt or put it in her mouth, Bean was not 
having it. Hence, the look in the picture below,
trying to take the pinecone away while I was not looking...
hahahah look at her face, like I couldn't see her.
Note the blue flower also now added to Tuts headband.
Yeah, that was Beans idea too, she has
such fashion sense.

 So, because the pinecones made her so nervous I decided
we would take them away.
Which made Tuts extremely upset. Our 
next idea was to wrap Christmas lights,
but Tuts was still screaming about the pine cone
so Bean thought giving her a few tight kisses might help....
 As you can see, it didn't help Tuts much.
Surely put Bean's mind at ease, Tuts dreaming of pine cones....
and bed.          
 My next idea was to try and get Tuts to pull Beans hair
like she always does so Bean was the best sport ever!
Trying to get her baby sister to grab her hair and pull
so Mumsie could capture one funny image for her
Christmas card.
Of all the times Tuts grabs that hair and pulls,
that night, I guess because she had permission,
she was a no-go. 
 Finally after about 90 snaps looking through the lens,
I did get a few good ones and landed up with two 
I could not decide from so am using both
this year.
Finally, Tuts just could not go anymore,
when she puts those fingers in her mouth like her
Daddy did sooo many years ago.
I gave her a bottle while I rocked her to sleep.
She was out in 10  minutes.
 I put Tuts down for her sweet dreams to
find Bean sitting in her room, waiting for me.
Look at the look of accomplishment on her face.
Oh to be three again.
I was more like Tuts, ready to go down,
Bean had other ideas,
"Mumsie now we can start our sleepover!"
....and that we did.

Thursday, November 20, 2014


I wrote a tribute to two people who I loved dearly.
My blogs are usually based on facts and cleared
by family for their permission prior to writing.
Yet, that post was written from love of a couple
before the obituary came out.
 The problem with my blog is,
I only knew Mr. Morris as an elder man
married to Ms. Priscilla, already retired
and through our church family.
I did know that Ms. Priscilla's children
were hers from a first marriage but
I did not realize so much happened
in Mr. Morris life prior to Mrs. Priscilla.
My heart is hurt this morning as I realize
I left out a very big and important part of
his younger life. One I just did not know of.
Like I said, my memories of Mr. Morris were
those after the loss of his first wife,
whom he was married to for 25 years!
He, in that life, had 6 children whom,
although I did not know, knowing the
great man they called Daddy, were very 
special to him. Today I can only ask
their forgiveness as I did not know,
I only knew of our church family,
the one he shared with me and those
others who loved him there too.
An apology to these children just does not
seem like enough and yet, I know if they are 
anything like their Dad, they will forgive my
oversight and writing the blog prior to 
seeing his obituary which I most assuredly would
have added all that information.
Again, I wrote it out of the love for him
and wanting to give comfort to those who loved
he and Mrs. Priscilla dearly.
In turn I hurt those who call him Daddy,
who now have lost both their parents, like me.
I know their pain as after loosing my Mommy
last year, although I was 50, I felt like an orphan.
so to you 6 children,
and last, but not least, his baby girl,
I ask for the forgiveness of leaving you all out
of my first blog. Again, it is not like
me to leave such an important part of his life
out of my blog, I truly just did not know.
I thank Tammy, who had the courage to send
me a very well written message to say my
information, though beautiful, was not completely correct.
I take pride in my blog and pray that 
I have maybe fixed any hurt I may have caused
by putting the blog out too soon.
Love to all who called this wonderful man
and both his beautiful wives,
Thelma and Priscilla.
Most of us, are lucky to have had one love
like this, Mr. Morris was privileged to have had two.
Once again, comfort and peace to the families
of these beautiful people.


Tuesday, November 18, 2014


It means something to me,
it means something to all who live there.
It is hard to explain the love of being raised
in a small town if trying to explain it to big town
folks, well there just are no words.
This week, just like when my little town is affected
by good things, it was highly affected by a big thing.
The death of two of our elders, Husband and wife...
...and with this tragic death, a car accident,
coming from one of their favorite places,
the Golden Meadow Senior Citizens Center,
I can now explain what a small town means to 
a girl like me, how all our lives are intertwined
over and over and over.
Mr.Maurice has been friends with the both of my parents,
He helped build the home I and all my siblings
were raised in.
I was not born yet, not even thought of,
my oldest sister, Simone was the only one born.
That same sister knows all those stories from
Mr. Maurice and many others from Mrs. Priscilla
because until she retired, she was the manager of 
that very same GM Senior Citizens Center.
As a young girl, they were our church family.
Saw them at church each time we went.
You see our small church,
Our Lady of Prompt Succor is the only church
all in Golden Meadow entered,
we made all our sacraments there
and it is the very same church that 
Mr. Maurice and Mrs. Priscilla were laid to rest.
Our lives did not just cross here, it continued
to cross throughout my life.
When Baby Boy went to Nursery school,
"Granny" aka, Mrs. Priscilla was his cook.
She cooked all the wonderful meals BB still loves.
Cynthia, Ms. Priscilla's daughter worked there
at the time and then owned the little day care
of Golden Meadow. Mrs. Priscilla taught 
these little ones how to eat like a cajun.
NO Peanut butter sandwiches for this gang,
Nope, Roux's and gumbo's, Jambalaya's and
Fricasse's. That is what my baby boy was eating
at his day care... and if there was something to be
fixed or built, there was MR. Maurice.
Many a times I went to pick up Baby boy to see
Granny rocking one of the babies who had just woke 
up from their nap or just wanted their momma.
Then there was the connection of Cynthia, Ms. Priscilla's
daugher, Mr. M's stepchild,
who is best friends with My sis, Rosie.
Since they were young but even more so as they
raised their own children, Darcus and Miki.
Cynthia and her LoJo and girls, Darcus and Nalon,
were at my sis house at every gathering.
Then Cynthia lost her sister, Priscilla's child, Erena
to the dreaded big C.
Because I was nursing on our bayou I got to know her
better as well as her kids, especially Jada.
Was it not enough that they lost Erena,
then Mrs. Priscilla was faced with her own fight of 
the big C... and won!
Ironically, she and Cynthia both faught it and won!
 She and Maurcie, 
inseperable. My mom, when living there and not
yet driving, this wonderful couple, always
made sure she had a ride to whatever was going on
in town. If it was a funeral, that they made all,
if it was for helping for the lenten gumbo's 
you would find my Mom as well as
Priscilla and Maurice.
How I loved helping with the lenten gumbo's 
surrounding myself with this couple as well
as all the other retired couples.
There were always many hugs and kisses
and much pride that I was there. You see, they knew
if the young did not get involved in our little church,
those things like lenten gumbo's and Ladies of LaSaLette
would be history. Mr. Maurice, always stirring a pot of
something at our gumbo luncheons.
A few years ago, we had a fund raiser for another
long time "belonger", Karen Terrebonne.
She had moved from the bayou many many years before,
but just like our town, don't matter how far you go, you 
are for Golden Meadow. Mr. Maurice and Ms. Priscilla
were there, for hugs and hard work.
I can go on and on about just how many ways our lives,
the families of the Bouzigards and the Collins'
are tied but its like that when you from Golden Meadow.
Now, they have been laid to rest, together, in their favorite
place on Earth besides being with their family, our 
little church. I longed to be there, to pay my respects
to all who loved this wonderful couple who taught us
"Youngens" so much....
I could not make it but I thought of them all day.
If you have to find a silver lining around a tragedy,
for Mrs. Priscilla and Mr. Maurice, it is this,
They met their Maker together, they would
have not wanted it any other way.
I am sure had they had their choice, that would
not have been the day they would have chosen to go
to Heaven, but I also know both of them had no doubt
where they were going and that their baby girl, Erena 
and many who went before them, including
their son in law, lojo, my Mommy
would be there. You can bet, as they left that Senior 
Citizens Center, they were full and they were happy.
You can almost believe they may have even been holding
hands as they did often. 
Yes, their death, that of
hit our town hard but their job here was done.
We, especially their family will long to see them many times.
Long to see them waiting for kisses as Maurice stirred
and Priscilla laid table clothes down at the center
preparing for  fund raising.
the Golden Meadow Senior Citizens Center
will be just a little bit quieter for a bit.
No Mr. Maurice to build shelves or fix broken things....
yes, our loss but Heaven, and the Big Man,
well, they gained big time,
a double winner.
Again, I say, the fact that they took their journey
to heaven together makes all of us who are suffering
from their loss a tad bit relieved.
Cynthia, Nalon, Darcus, and the whole family,
from the Collins family,
Simone, Veronica, Peter, Rosie, Celena and myself, Lilly
are with you all in these most difficult few months
coming up. 
If it gives you any comfort,
we loved your dear parents/grandparents.
They meant so much to so many, some that you all 
may not have even  known, they were the 
our little town of Golden Meadow has lost another
set of our wonderful elders.
Heaven is happy, here, we mourn.
Love to you all from 
the Collins Clan

Saturday, November 15, 2014


Everyone who knows anything about me and
the old blog days, you know how I love me
some Oprah, I mean if I go back I'm guessing
I can find at least 5 posts over the last 6 years
explaining how I know if Oprah knew me, she 
would dump Gail and I would be her bestie....
(Sorry Besties, but I'd let you hang too)
Then she comes out with THE BOOK
and I am just a tad jealous of my girl.
You see, she wrote the book that I should 
have written. Forever I have had the desire to
write a book and each page I turn I almost
can believe that is me writing it, we believe
so much of the same thing. But really,
her book will definitely get a girl in her
50's thinking. Yesterday, well last night,
I was full of thoughts sparked from Oprah's book
as well as spending time with my Bailey Boo.
All my kiddo's from my elementary school days
are either graduated or in high school and in the
next few years will all go on their way.
You know we have all read how if we could write
a letter to our younger self, what would we say?
I will write it here, write a love letter to my younger 
self in hopes that some of the teens in my life 
will gather what I say and hold it close to their heart...
1) Puppy love is just that, new love that
sparks all those things in you that have 
you believing this is the one for you forever.
I fell in love with mines, he was my only
for most of my life... Now we are divorcing.
Don't let your first love be your only one.
2) Hold your virginity tightly and close to you.
Once it's gone we can't get it back. 
For me, I had sex for the wrong reasons,
to keep a boyfriend, yeah he became my husband
but I still gave something that I cherished away 
because he wanted to, not because I wanted to.
We are too young at this age, to live through all
the "girl"emotions that go along with sex.
3) Believe me, when you are a teen with a teen boy,
sex will not be fun for you. The kissing, hugging, all
those things you will like, but the actual act, not
many teens I know like the actual act AND if
you are with a boy in your age range, he is selfish.
He won't last very long and he won't know what to
do with you once he has gotten what he wants.
4) All teen boys, even though they truly believe
they love you, once you have sex with them, they
will want you to do it often. Gone will be the innocent
days of just holding hands, walking and flirting.
5) If you find yourself giving in the grown up Sex thing
as a teen then you have to be prepared to act like
an adult. Which means you have to do what you have to do
to protect yourself, never, ever, trust your love to 
protect you. Have your own stash of condoms even
if you are on some form of birth control.
6) No babies are mistakes, they are all blessings but The Big Man
did not make for children to have children.
If you are old enough to have sex, then you have to brave
enough to go to your parents and talk.
7) If you decide to have the grown up thing called
"Making love" which is really just sex,
then be grown up to speak to your parents, at least 
your Mommy. 
8) Your parents love you unconditionally, after they scream,
cry, etc. over the teen things you may do, in the end,
they love you anyway, unconditionally, go to them.
If you need to jump in their lap, the same one that
used to bring you comfort when your life was simple,
then do it. They will not turn you away. If they do,
then it is they, not you, who may need counseling.
9) You, as a teen, will roll you eyes, talk back to your 
Mom, hurt her in ways you don't even know and then
you will grow up and one day hold your own baby in
your arms and you will cry for many reasons but one of
the main reasons will be because you were so mean and 
selfish as a teen. 
10) Even after this realization those same parents?
they still love you unconditionally.
11) Be a kid for as long as you can. Right now,
all your bills are paid by those people you call your parentals.
You have no worries of a job, bills, etc. someone else
has those worries, so don't grow up so fast because,
believe me, once you do, you will long for the day
you wake up on a Saturday at 1pm, to a breakfast
consisting of whatever you put in as your order,
and your Mommy will cook it. When you grow up,
you will be the short order cook and be cooking
on one of your only two days off of the week.
12) At least twice a year, Christmas and on your own 
birthday, write your parents a love letter, let them know
what they mean to you, that even though you are
a typical selfish teen, you love them. Thank them
for the gift of life and always being there for you.
Believe me, they will treasure those letters forever....
13)Remember what you do, what you say, on social media
does not go away, it lives on somewhere in that world of 
iCloud so don't put nothing out there that your adult self
cannot answer to when you go in for the job you want.
You don't want to go for the dream job you want and
are most comfortable with and be looked over to 
someone who can't do the job half as good as you 
but has no "skeletons that can be pulled up on social media."
14) Allow yourself to grow and mature slowly, like
the old Oak trees, they start of young and bendable
to grow slowly into one of the strongest most
beautiful trees in the world. That is you, 
live and answer to yourself, let no one change or talk
you out of what you know, in your heart, to be true.
I could go on forever, but going to stop here...
lots to think about as I close a letter to my younger self.

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

first things fiirst..

Some say I think too much, 
some say I need to learn how to shut off the brain.
I can't. So tonight, I know I want to blag about the 
wonderful family reunion that I had the privilege
to be part of but my head is also blowing up about
Oprah's book... because I do believe she wrote MY BOOK,
You know, the one I always am working on, 
that i journal and journal and journal for...
then she writes MY BOOK....
OKAY, that is tomorrow's blog....
Saturday, oh Saturday, how I loved you!
Tiffany, Bean and I left early and headed 
to Lacombe, a two hour drive well worth it
to see all my dad's family that were there.
So heartwarming, to watch my grandchild
play with cousins, my own Dad's ancestors.
Pictures tell so much and I will post many 
but I felt him, I felt my Daddy there.
When I looked into my cousin Emel's face,
I saw my dad's face, his dad's face.
I felt my Nannie, Daddy's sister, Aunt Nan TaTa.
Buddy and Geneva were there and there families
so I knew she was there. Geez, I miss her....
Then there were all those others not there,
Uncle Joe, Aunt Mae Mae's husband.
My dear Uncle Red who loved me in a way
different from some. He knew I was spoiled,
probably thought growing up, I could have used a few
spankings but never, ever did he say a word, just squinted
those eyes, and smoked that cigarette with my dad and 
smiled. He and my Aunt GaGald kids,
Bert, Fay, Dela gave us the best party ever, I cannot
thank them enough. It was also a celebration,
celebration that Fay is cancer free and our reason
for the party. Her granddaughter surprised her saying
she could not make the party and did so anyway.
Her Mom, Stephanie, still as beautiful as ever.
There were just so many people, so many stories to 
be talked of but will end it with saying,
it was great, amazing, passed to fast, and having Bean
with me made it even better.
Thanks to Fay and Billy and all who did the hard work
for having us all.

Saturday, November 8, 2014

Finally the time is here...

The Collins family are gathering for a family reunion!
Sooo excited to see all my first cousins, extended cousins,
aunts today as we gather in the name of my Daddy's family.
Last time we did this was when we gathered in my old
home of Golden Meadow for the 50th wedding anniversary
for my Dad's baby sister, Aunt Jeannie and her beau 
Uncle Roy:

 One of the many reasons we have to do this not only today
but hopefully more often is out of my Daddy's family,
above, already two are gone on to the next world,
My mom on the far left and my Aunt Nan TaTa, 
4th from left. Time, it is a'ticking and we
need to slow down our fast paced life to play with 
the cousins....
Yep, these are the cousins, only first cousins... and that is 
not all of them.. The Collins family believed in lots of kids,
Knowing them, would not be surprised if they had a 
competition in their baby making days to see who could have more.
Today, not only the aunts and Uncles, first cousins, second cousins
and on and on and on, with their spouses and their own children...
Oh what a day it will be. An added bonus for me?
Baby boy called yesterday to see if I still wanted to
bring Bean with me... heck yeah!!!!
Tiffany, my niece came sleep last night so us three
girls will be trecking to Lacombe this am.
We don't need a reason to gather, really we don't.
Yet this one is special. My cousin Fay is celebrating
the remission and end of her cancer treatments for
lung cancer!
So, as my wonderful Bono would sing with U2
Thanks to all my Griffin cousins for pulling this one off!

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

When the time comes...

First and foremost, I want to put this out there.
This is not a whining/complaining blog.
I am living in a beautiful home until it sells,
and Ron is making sure it is maintained and bills
are paid until it sells. 
This blog is about my future home, the one I am going
to have once this sells, the one I can decorate as I please
and the ideas I have. Yes, sometimes I get impatient to
the fact that I feel stagnate, unable to have my own
space to "live in" but in time, as Ron says,
the home will sell and I will get my chance.
With that said, I am always surfing the net, magazines
for ideas for my next place.
This morning, I see this"
An old upright radio redone to add to this home, the
back of it actually is a wine bottle holder.
My home will be filled with this kind of things,
I want to decorate so that when you walk in, you will
think, "Lilly lives here"
Now in search of an old radio....
Isn't it a beauty???