Monday, November 30, 2009
Yes, call me crazy.
I am ready to go back to work.
A week off was a good little break
to get me ready for the next three weeks
until Christmas holidays.
Haven't had a chance yet to go through
all the pictures I scanned at Veronica's house
on Thanksgiving day
but I have some good ammunition
against some of you out there....
Tedi and I hit the
black Friday shopping world
on Friday but thankfully
we only went to Houma because
by 12 I had had enough but did
manage to buy me a tree for my
mantel for so, so cheap.
Will post pictures eventually.
Yes, I have been lax but beginning today
I will be back out here entertaining
you who still read, critique,
Happy Monday to all!
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Well all I am thankful for, of course!
The holidays this year are different for me.
Having one child married living over an hour away
and a family who lives an hour the other way has me
torn on exactly what to do over the holidays.
Ronnie being in Alaska, well it just finds
my immediate family separated.
Because the car is not exactly fun for me
I dread sometimes knowing I have to get in it
and make the trip to visit those whom I love.
It wasn't until yesterday morning that I made
my final decision on what exactly I would do
but as usual, once I make my decision it is pretty final.
I called Rod and texted Kd to say Jesi and I was coming
over to have supper with them.
Kd had worked so I planned to leave in time to get
there about an hour before she got home,
go eat and back in the car to get home.
Oh, how thankful I am on this Thanksgiving day that I did.
Sometimes inside of myself, I want to believe
it's not such a big deal if I miss a holiday with my
children, why after all they are big kids now...
Jesi and I get there and there is so much for Roddie to
share with us. There is the brand new truck he
just bought him that is amazingly beautiful!
Rod doesn't show excitement often anymore
but this he is happy about,
showing Jes and I all the features in the truck
and offering to drive to Fat Daddy's so we can
ride in his new wheels.
He saved me some poo-doo breast wrapped in bacon
stuffed with cheese and Jalapenos that he
cooked for Kd the day before.
Those things were amazing and I devoured them!
He fills me in on all his hunting adventures and there is one
moment, he bends down to get something and he
is looking up at me over the kitchen counter,
he is telling me something but I am just staring at
him as I get a flashback of him as a little boy
saying, "Mom, I need some loving"
I am amazed that this man once lived in my body...
sometimes these thoughts are just surreal.
Kd comes in and she is so tired but she puts on her
happy face and we go to Fat Daddy's
where the poor-boys are amazing
and the fried portabello mushrooms are to die for.
As we always do when Jesi and Roddie are together,
we reminisce of old times.
I watch Baby Girl remember things with her
photographic memory and spill out stories
that Rod and I have forgotten until she mentions them.
Kd is laughing so hard she is crying and
Rod and Jesi are laughing at their memories.
Again, for a little while I am amazed that
these two grown children belonged to me at one time.
I am transported back to the times they are
speaking of, I am their Mother, I was there,
I remember and I am proud.
They are beautiful in looks, they are beautiful in personality
and they came from me and the only man
I ever loved, their Daddy.
I look over at Kd and can't remember her not
being there, so thankful that my son
found this wonderful woman to share his life with.
I am overwhelmed with love for these three young adults.
Honored that I am still important enough
in their lives that they still enjoy time with me.
My heart is full, there is nothing I want.
So today I head down-the-bayou to spend time
with my Mumsie and family that I grew up with myself.
Veronica, as always, comes through for us who make
the trip down there. We can always depend on her
for something on the holidays.
I long for her house most holidays just because it has
always been her house I spent holidays at as my
children grew up.
After Mom sold the family home to C and Ted
Veronica's home became the gathering place.
Except for Xmas eve when we would meet
at C's for that holiday.
Every Sunday when my kids were growing, she would
cook and we would gather.
Sometimes we played board games,
sometimes we just gossiped
but being together was the most important.
Always her house and I still want it.
I want it and the people who meet there,
I want my Mumsie there with me.
I want to see my nieces and nephews and their offspring.
So I end this long-winded blog
by adding a prayer that C taught me when I was
little, one she made up and I said every night while
growing up just because, at the time, it covered everyone:
GOD BLESS MY MOMMA AND DADDY
SISTERS, BROTHERS, NIECES, NEPHEWS,
AUNTS, UNCLES, COUSINS, FRIENDS,
THOSE WHO I LIKE AND
THOSE WHO I DISLIKE
Of course, these days I have to add
but the prayer today is still appropriate:
Happy Thanksgiving to all
Don't forget to journal,
What are you thankful for?
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Every once in a while I miss the Mumsie I used to have.
The one who would pop into your home unannounced,
boss around everyone in the home, fuss my kids,
open the pot to see what I was cooking...
Yes, I did say I missed that Mom sometimes.
Why? Because she was also the Mom who
you could call to pick up the pieces of your
shattered day and she would fix it.
Whether it was watching the kids,
cooking supper, she was dependable.
However I would trade the old Mumsie
for the one I have right now at this time.
I have never seen my Mumsie happier, funnier,
easy to get along with.
Her dementia can be aggravating, like when she
hides her money from herself and can't tell you why
or where she hid it.
She is really good at hiding it and forgetting where
she put it. So Monday C is looking all over for her
black money wallet before Bingo.
It is nowhere to be found and C calls me for ideas.
Well I am just a little frustrated because it seems like
every day we are searching for the wallet.
It is not found so yesterday I head that way early
determined to find the wallet/money.
I tell myself "be patient"
she doesn't remember where it is.
Of course, by the morning she doesn't even remember it is lost.
We begin the hunt looking in her favorite spots
then I hear from her end of the room,
"Look where it is, in my shoe!"
She is laughing so hard she can hardly say it to me.
I am laughing in shock myself.
"Mom, in your shoe?"
"Don't ask me, Lilly, why it is in my shoe"
Well we are now both laughing so hard we can't talk.
Finally we calm down and call C
I tell C we found the wallet but I'll let Mumsie tell
her where she found it.
she gets on the phone and starts:
"C, I found my money in my......"
then she is laughing so hard she can't talk.
This, this is the mumsie I so love today.
I have never seen her so cracked up as this and
she really can't tell C the word Shoe.
By the time I get on the phone
C too is laughing up a storm.
Oh, what a way to begin the day.
Oh, I would not trade this Mumsie for anything in the world.
I fear the day she dies because not having
this happy, go-with-the-flow, woman in my life
will change me forever.
Dementia is not always a bad thing,
in Mumsie's case, it's made her better than ever.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Let me inform you guys this morning.
Norman Vincent Peale was an inspirational author
who wrote way back in the 1950's books on living happy.
My friend, Tanial turned me on to his writings about
7 years ago and I am now a fan of a man who
is now dead for many years.
I own three of his books all rolled into one
with the titles being:
THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING
THE POSITIVE PRINCIPLE OF TODAY
ENTHUSIASM MAKES THE DIFFERENCE
Had to buy this on ebay because I don't
believe his books are in publication anymore.
Yet what he writes is sound advice for all
no matter how young or old you are.
He grounds me into knowing exactly what
type of life I can have and reminds me that
ultimately it is my choice.
So today I would like to share with you all his
MAKING ANY DAY GOOD
1) THINK A GOOD DAY- to make a good day, first see
it good in consciousness. Do not allow any mental
reservations that it will not be good. Events are largely
governed by creative thought, so a positive concept of the
day will strongly tend to condition it to be as imagined.
2) THANK A GOOD DAY- give thanks in advance for the good
day ahead. Thank and affirm a good day.
This helps make it so.
3) PLAN A GOOD DAY-specifically and definitely know
what you propose to do with the day.
Plan your work and work your plans.
4) PUT GOOD INTO THE DAY- Put bad thoughts, bad attitudes,
bad actions into the day and it will take on bad characteristics.
Put good thoughts, good attitudes, good actions into the day
and the will make the day good.
5) PRAY A GOOD DAY- Begin each day with that powerful
affirmation from Psalm 118:24: "This is the day that
the Lord hath made, we will rejoice and be glad in it."
Start the day with prayer and finish it the same way.
Then it is bound to be good even if it brings tough experiences.
6) FILL THE DAY WITH ENTHUSIASM- Give the day all
you've got and it will give you all it's got, which will be plenty.
Enthusiasm will make a big difference in any day and in any job.
So today, this is what I share with you,
old Norman Vincent Peale
and wishing all a great day!
Friday, November 20, 2009
Before I begin my blog,
picture is of me and our school granny taken at
school, she is in her mid 70's and still works everyday!!!
My job as a school nurse can be very challenging
but it is the very best job for me.
Today I focus on the glorious 9 days off I will
have after finishing my day today.
To be able to feel that excitement of a week off of school
at my age is the bomb.
Remember being a little child,
the day before holiday or summer vacation?
The excitement you felt just thinking
of no homework, no going to bed early,
waking up early,
all routines could be blown because
"SCHOOL WAS OUT"
Excitement is in the air at my school.
Kids are being happy,
coworkers are counting down the hours
knowing we are coming back
for just three weeks before
Christmas holiday is even exciting.
Pray for the little children who are not so happy.
Who's lives are easier by coming to school
because school is a safe place
where they get two hot meals,
hugs when they need it,
discipline when they need it,
Where many care about their future.
Pray for our schools also
for those children who enter it
angry and ill, who try to make it an unsafe place
just because they hate their lives and
want others to pay for it.
Pray for us who daily are a part of all these
Help us all to focus on what is really important
and help us to do the right thing in each
It is hard sometimes to see the things that
some children must face daily.
Things that even we as adults, couldn't do.
Be thankful for the children you get to
take home at the end of the day,
of those that you call family.
Don't hate me because I have 9 days off,
what, you say?
DON'T HATE ME BECAUSE I HAVE 9 DAYS OFF!!!!!!!
ooooh, the green eye of jealousy is not becoming
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Okay, so I like the the song in the title
and I love this picture...
Yet, my words today are about growing up way, way,
On Saturday I went to Thibodauxville
and while there ran into many students from my school.
One such 4th grader and her Mom
were spending the day and one of
my 4th grade boy students and his mom
were also with them.
I hugged all and then asked what they
Mom of said boy tells me that this little girl
is her son's girlfriend so they are spending
the day at Thibodauxville, a little "date".
I like to fall on the cement.
I jokingly tell the children they are
too young for that!!!
Yet it bothers me.
It bothers me that parents support this
type of behavior at such a young age.
They grow up so fast without the
encouragement of parents
and dating and boyfriends, well
it will come soon enough.
I don't know, call me old-fashioned
and yes, you probably hear this all the time,
but in 4th grade I didn't even think of boys.
I was too busy playing,
playing with my barbies,
drawing pictures of homes I wished to have one day,
loving my little nieces and nephews...
For me, this is not cute,
I guess because now being the mother
of two grown children,
if I could go back,
I would be selfish with time spent with my children.
I was the kind of mother
that did many fun things with Rod and Jes,
I was the type of Mom who went outside and played,
I was the one who went to picnics and parks
with my kids.
Yet, it passed way too fast.
There were too many times that I settled
with friends over so I could have time to myself.
I pray my children have enough childhood memories
to last them,
to remember that we did have lots of fun.
However, just like time does,
I wonder, do I have enough memories?
I have no regrets,
but if I could go back,
I would be more selfish and make them
spend time with me more.
When asked to play,
I would say yes more and be aggravated less.
I would treasure the times that I had,
when I and their Dad was their sole-decision maker.
When I had full reign of planning their days,
When I could have made their days
whatever I wanted it to be.
So my friends,
tell them they are too young for it.
Stand up to the parents who think this is cute
even when you wonder if something is wrong with you,
Keep them young and young at heart for as long as you can.
Spend less money and more time on you children.
I often say there are true cases of attention deficit
but there are many cases of
deficit of attention.
I see it all the time in the world,
at my school.
When the world is full of middle school children
who are pregnant well,
do we need to encourage,
I think not!
Just my opinion, of course,
who am I to tell people how to raise their children?
No one of course,
except old aunt LIL who
loves all of you and your offspring,
who has just a little experience and knowledge.
To share my thought with you,
Have a good Thanksgiving!
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
It's been a few days since I posted...
Probably because my bbff
(blog best friend forever)
has not been around here to give
me his opinions.
Hopefully Mikie will be back
on track soon blogging
just isn't the same without his
hope to be getting
back into the blogging world soon.
Just kinda lost my
MoJo for a little while...
Friday, November 13, 2009
A 7 year old girl is tucked into bed by her mother
while her daddy is fighting a war in Afghanistan.
Her brand new 3 week old sister and another sibling
is also asleep. Laying near her is her cousin.
I wonder what little Paige dreamed of as a stray
bullet comes into what should have been
her safe place and hits her in the neck.
Her Mother hears her terrifying screams
to find that her oldest child has been
shot in the neck.
She dies later that evening.
Her father was on the news yesterday,
talking about the call he receives from
his wife before he makes his 4,000 mile journey
to bury his little girl, Paige.
He speaks of the confusion inside himself.
The joy of seeing his new baby daughter
for the first time only to realize
that the task at hand is to
bury his oldest born daughter,
his baby girl.
He will never be the same
I pray they now let him stay home
to pick up the pieces of their shattered lives.
I am angered that these two 21 year old punks
are now saying,
WE DIDN'T MEAN IT, WE WANTED TO SHOOT A CAR.
What do I say?
Yes, you meant it, you punks,
If you left your home, your safe place,
with a loaded gun,
you meant to cause trouble,
and you did,
you ruined a family.
What should happen to you all?
Well you should put on military greens,
fly to Afghanistan and fight for
your freedom as little Paige's dad
was trying to do for you.
No jail is good enough,
the death sentence is not good enough,
Go where it is legal to carry a gun.
You can shoot cars there as you run from
stray bullets and pray that they don't hit you.
What does this Daddy remind us?
Never send your children to bed with either of you angry.
Always tuck them in, say you love them,
forgive them for any wrongs of the day,
ask for forgiveness for any mistakes you may have made.
Kiss them and hug them because
one day you may find yourself, like him,
no longer able to do this.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
I have a few sayings that i like to use,
my favorite being,
FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT
I learned this one at alanon many years ago.
Made to remind us that
your attitude is up to you.
If I am unhappy, tired, aggravated,
I say aloud,
FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT
Yesterday while at work,
I hear one of our older teachers
who is coming up to retirement say:
LAY LOW, LET IT GO
Well this one stuck with me and I just know
it will become one of my favorites.
What does this mantra say to me?
I don't have to control issues
and I don't have to be the leader all the time
to make things right.
I can learn to keep my mouth shut sometimes
and let it go.
Especially when it doesn't involve me.
Sometimes I want to be righteous and fix
things that aren't really my business.
Sometimes I get my feelings hurt and can sulk
forgetting that some things are not made to
be taken personal.
LAY LOW AND LET IT GO
I will realize that the world is not out to get me.
If I am truly honest,
I must realize that to the world,
I am not important enough to be out to get me.
So I will now live by this motto
I will be a happier person.
Thanks Debbie for stating this
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
If you are taking Aleena and Steve (mike)
to the bayou today make sure when you get to Thibodaux
you guys go to
Jean Lafitte Museum.
It is free and awesome with much history
of the cajun history.
It is located on the bayou side of highway one,
the part called St. Mary.
It is on the bottom floor of the local library here
If you guys get to Thib. after 4:00Pm Call me,
because I need to send something back with
you guys for M
love and have fun!!!!!
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Hugh and his parents begin their travels today.
Missing a week of school will be cool,
something to flip over,
missing brothers and sisters, well not so cool.
Heavy hearts and hopeful thoughts,
that is what goes on when a family
has to be separated for any time.
Because Rebecca and Mikie are
very private about their little family,
I will not be sharing much on the blog
about their journey but couldn't
loose the opportunity
to let them know,
I understand the emotions going
through you guys right now.
Soon everyone will be under one roof
and all will be well
have some fun while you guys are in Ohio
and know much love abounds you.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Tiffy and I at Southdown plantation
those aren't wrinkles you see on our face,
the sun was in our eyes and we were squinting ;^)
Had to get a picture of this brick wall
but the girl didn't think it was so special...
These two cousins are way too cute together,
when they get to spend time with each other,
you will often see them just like this...
Cami read through the whole shower,
a true book worm I must say...
There is nothing like a beautiful pregnant woman to get me
thinking of how right everything is about babies.
My philosophy on babies are none are mistakes.
There are mistakes made by people involved in
their coming, but the child itself, is never a mistake.
They all come to us with a purpose
and they give me hope of better days.
As for this little boy who is to be called Zachary,
Well, there is just everything right awaiting him
when he arrives.
He has two loving parents who can provide for him
in every way imaginable,
two parents who love each other and are committed
to giving him the best life they are possible of...
He has a pee-pee teepee to protect his parents from the pee-pee
that will come out of his wee-wee...
He has a Mother who will proudly sport him no matter
what way she is to carry him...
He has two auntie's one who will be his godmother
to spoil him rotten and tell him yes when his
mom and dad say no...
he has numerous family members who will love him dearly
and give him diapers and necessities he needs for
daily living, like this one Tie made in the form of a wreath...
He has other second cousins who are artistically talented
like Jesi who painted this beautiful picture of Christopher Robin
and his friend, Winnie the Pooh...
Love from his Aunt Lil that never runs out for any little children
born to this family...
Cousins who will travel to all his birthday parties just
to hang out with him...
A gramps to teach him all those things that aren't
necessary to life but necessary to enjoying life...
Oh, and of course, I mentioned the two
parents who will love him unconditionally
who are about to find out just what love
a love that you would die for,
a love that you would sell every earthly possession
just to have him with you forever.
A beautiful family, a lucky baby,
that is all I have to say about that!!!!!
Saturday, November 7, 2009
This weekend will bring me plenty of joy.
First thing is one of my godchildren, Tedi is here
with Tiffy to spend the weekend at
AUNT LIL'S RETREAT HOUSE
yes, They have come for a little rest and relaxation,
time spent visiting and doing fun stuff.
This morning we are heading out early
for garage sales and this afternoon,
will be visiting Southdown
for their annual craft show.
Tomorrow myself, Jesi, Mommee, and Kd
will head towards Carencro
to spend the afternoon
with my oldest godchild, M
as we celebrate the soon-to-be-here
baby boy she houses in her belly.
She and Andre's little baby boy
will be here in January and tomorrow is her
Can't wait to see her and all the people
who will gather to celebrate with her.
Aleena and Mike/Steve will also be there
so I am excited about this whole weekend!
Be safe and take my love with all of you,
wherever you may go.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Last night I did go to St. Genevieve church to
view the relic of Mary Magdalen.
I wasn't going to, her time of arrival had been
pushed back to 6:00 pm and thousands were
expected to be there.
Yet, I went anyway,
just thinking that this once-in-a-lifetime event
never to have happened before was
within walking distance of my home,
well I just couldn't miss it.
I arrived at church at 6:00 pm
and was lucky enough to squeeze into a pew
to begin the wait.
The priest who made the trek with MM
gave us a brief talk
reminding us that never has a relic such as this
has ever toured the United States and especially
not to "wherever he is"
He gave a brief history of exactly who MM was thought
to be, a prostitute who was forgiven and befriended
by Jesus Christ.
She was there when he was nailed to the cross,
bending down on the right leg,
the shin bone that we were to view tonight.
She was believed to be the first to witness
the resurrection of Jesus.
He also reminded us that we can choose to believe
or choose not to, that there is much history
he has studied to prove this but
he was not here to argue his point but
to allow MM to do what she does best,
bring peace to people.
He explained that MM was just a regular human
just like us all who chose to change her life
and become hope to others.
This relic was not thought to bring
miraculous healing or miracles but
to bring hope, prayer, faith to many.
She has done that by her travels
she is here to relieve burdens of many
and she brings giggles to others.
She reminds us to laugh, to giggle.
Many people were holding rosaries, prayer cards,
cloths, flowers, all for the simple act
of rubbing on the glass that encases this relic.
The traveling priest explained that these things,
can now become our own relic.
I always have a rosary in my purse,
given to me by my friend, Sarah Day,
from Rome blessed by the Pope.
I take out my rosary so as to be able to say
it touched the relic of MM.
The procession begins and at about 8:00 pm
I get my chance.
A very small darkened bone enclosed in
a rounded glass casing....
I hold my rosary up to the enclosure,
thank her for being here.
I thank the priest for bringing her to us.
I am not moved, I don't feel differently by this act.
I turn to leave and this is where I am moved.
The church is once again packed, shoulder to shoulder,
with people awaiting the second round of viewing.
I walk outside and there are thousands of people lined
up to enter our little church of
St. Genevieve to be part of the peace
this relic seems to bring wherever she goes.
This moves me to tears.
That with all the pain, wars, killings,
crimes, starvation, suffering in the world,
these people, myself have come out
to pray in mutual belief that we can
do our part to make the world a better place.
I am glad to have done this.
I slept last night the best I have in weeks,
I awakened this morning with no back pain
probably but I choose to believe that
my sacrifice has brought me freedom from pain
for one night.
Thank You MM
hope you enjoyed your Thibodaux visit.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
I have decided that if I don't do one thing, I must do another.
I am a person who must be inspired or I tend to get lazy.
Yes, you heard it, I can be lazy.
What inspires me?
Well walking and listening to music does it.
However, there are days that I just can't walk.
On those days, my head is not as positive as I'd like it.
I don't write like I want to,
I don't use my thoughts like I should.
I tend to want to focus on the negative instead of the positive.
It's not the way I like to roll.
Background to this story is that
Chase's grandmother, Mrs. Sue called me on Monday
to ask me if I knew if and when the relic
of Mary Magdalen was coming to St. Genevieve church.
I was embarrassed to say I didn't know,
embarrassed because this is my church and I should have known.
Embarrassed because Jesus' best friends thigh bone
will be at my church and I didn't know!!!!!!!
I have been lax in my church going or taking the fast way out
by going with Mommee at the manor.
Because I promised to find out and call her yesterday
and because I couldn't walk yesterday and had
plenty of time, I decided to go to church that morning.
I did find out for Mrs. Sue that the
relic of Mary Magdalen is in fact going to be at
St. Genevieve from 1:30pm to 9:30pm today
(in case you are interested in visiting)
but I found out oh, so much more!
I stand there in my newly renovated church and realize
I need the ritual of my catholic faith to be the
person I want to be.
Not because I believe attending church gets me closer
to God, a better place in heaven.
I don't even believe you have to attend church to be
the most faithful person.
I do believe it is something I need in my life,
because I love the place, I know I am a better
person when I attend, it inspires me,
nourishes me to give back to others in the way
I want to.
By beginning my day by taking the focus off myself
and praying for others I am a better person.
Right there, in this beautiful church,
I make a promise not to God because really,
He loves me no matter what,
but to myself:
If it ain't gunna be one thing then it'll have to be another...
So if I find myself not being able to physically exercise,
then I will have to either exercise spiritually or mentally.
You ask, ( okay maybe you didn't ask but you are going
to hear it anyway) How will I mentally exercise?
By either journaling, reading something,
learning something, creating something.
I must exercise:
PHYSICAL, MENTAL, OR SPIRITUAL EXERCISE.
One or the other, no more excuses,
no more laziness!
Love to all and do some form of exercise today!
Monday, November 2, 2009
YES, THE SAINTS ARE COMING,
TONIGHT THE UNITED STATES WILL HAVE
THE CHANCE TO WATCH THE
NEW ORLEANS SAINTS
PLAY MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL.
FOR SO LONG OUR TEAM WAS LOOKED UPON
AS A JOKE FOR A PROFESSIONAL FOOTBALL TEAM.
THE LAST FEW YEARS HAVE BEEN USED
TO MAKE A BETTER NAME FOR OUR TEAM.
THIS IS OUR YEAR,
THIS IS THE YEAR THAT WE
COMPLETELY CHANGE THE WAY
THE SAINTS ARE LOOKED UPON.
NEVER DO I REMEMBER THE SAINTS
EVER BEING 6-0.
LETS HOPE THE REAL DREW BREESE
KNOWS THAT HE DOESN'T PLAY FOOTBALL
WITH A HORNETS BASKETBALL.
HAVE A GREAT MONDAY
AND WATCH THE SAINTS PLAY TONIGHT.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Jesi always has to laugh, just can't get into character...
robin the hood riding "chaalie"
Kisses for dog
Chase's impersonation of a pirate
dog in hot pursuit of a criminal, his wife enjoying her endowment
Jesi enjoying the endowment...
Kris again riding "chaalie"
Jesi and Kaylee getting ready for the football game
Jesi and Chase's football uniforms...