Friday, October 31, 2014


As I drank my coffee and surfed Facebook, 
I came across this reading. 
I think I could have written this myself.
Since I have been single I have dated a 
few men. Then there was one special one, I thought
it could work, but our differences got in the way.
We tried, we really did, but it was like trying
to mix oil in water. Like I have said before to him
and to others, no regrets with that man.
He will always hold a special place in my heart.
So since then, since we decided that I needed to move
on, I have had a few dates. I read this reading
and it is the way I want to look at this single life.
With no regrets, if I wonder if it is right, then
I probably shouldn't do it.
But if I choose something I have to believe
it was the right choice at the time.
Refusing to live the rest of my life with regret.
Thank you, Amanda Torroni,
whoever you are!

Friday, October 24, 2014

there are those days..

Most days, I am my happy self,
moving along in the world, talking to people I don't 
even know, trying to be nice to all,
scrapping my heart away,
spending time with the grand babies,
traveling to my two other towns, Thib and DTB
to share my time with all those I love in those places.
Yesterday, I was so thankful to have the Bean in the
afternoon after school, as well as being able to take her
to school. I have not cried for my Mommy for some time.
Of course I miss her daily but the tears don't fall much 
anymore. I don't know if it is the loss of Dr. Hutch
that has me emotional, or the predicament of
wanting so much to sell the house so I can have my
own home to move on. I am ready to have
my own home, to decorate instead of having
packed boxes wherever I can hide them.
Anyway yesterday, I was talking to my niece,
Tiffany, talking about the party we are going to
on Saturday, a Halloween costume party,
discussing costumes. Then we begin talking 
of Mothering, her baby girl is 18 and living with
her Daddy. She is in our hearts and talks a lot lately.
I share a few thoughts I have on the whole mothering
a teen and all of a sudden, I try to tell her,
"I would give an arm to have one more day with Mommee"
and I just cannot get the words out.
It hits me sometime like that, I just can't get the words
out for the tears. I know the tears are not just about my Mommy.
It is the loss of Hutch, the change in a relationship, the
unsale of this house that has me stagnate, all of this
catching up on me.
Now, I am not normally a whiner,
those who know me well, know I am a very optimistic 
person, always seeing the better part of life,
I try and give advice to others who ask for it 
but lately its like a black cloud following over my head.
Today, I change that. I am not going to let these issues
get the best of me, loose who I really am.
Last night, I have a phone conversation with a dear
friend who I owed amends to, we cleared up lots
of miscommunications we had in the last few weeks.
He has told me often that texting is not good. 
Last night I have to agree with him as both of us,
because of text, took those texts to mean things neither
of us meant. 
I will not let the devil of life change me,
I will miss my dear friend, Troy but I can't change what is.
I can't bring my Mommy back, even giving an arm,
won't get her here for one day,
But one day, one day, I know we will be reunited because
I believe in God and the life He promises after.
Thanks, Tiffy for listening to my cry,
Thanks Dr. P. for allowing me to make my amends to you,
Hutch, hug my Mommy when you find her up there in Heaven.
Now on to find the Auntie Lil/Mumsie I am….
Mommy and I at a Christmas Pokeno party
Baby boy and his favorite Mommee at his wedding.
Mommy and Uncle Luke at her 90th bday party.

Always her baby, don't matter how old I got.
Not to Mommy for her bday.
At one of our many Mother/Daughter tea parties.
Bean and four generations...
Will always be so thankful that Bean and Mommy knew each other.
She still talks about her.
I may have been her baby but this gypsy baby was her true love...

Thursday, October 23, 2014

My Bean, she understands me sooo much!

Let me set the scenario:
Yesterday slept at Kd so she could go to work
and both the munchkins were up early.
Last year I gave Bean a book with push buttons
that make noise called Monster Mash.
I remember what each button says and sings.
So, as Bean is eating her breakfast, I read the book
and when it calls for a button to be pushed I 
lip sing each and act it out.
Bean laughs and laughs,
J.Bell just looks at me like she is either scared
or can't believe this crazy woman is part of her world.
Probably wondering when I am going away.
I say to Bean,
"Sister thinks I am crazy"
Bean replies,
"It's okay Mumsie, she just don't understand
how crazy you are yet"
REally???? does she really look at me as crazy?
Oh well, she must like it because not only does
she ask me to read the book again,
but she acts out the buttons with me,
remembered from my practice and last year.
We even get a crack of a smile out of J.Belle,
we gunna get her on our side….

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Death of a wonderful man, a brother...

I just cannot grasp my mind or heart around the loss
of my dear friend, old boss, Dr. Troy Hutchinson.
The last few years had been hard ones for him but
he also had gotten himself back together and 
just a few months ago, when Ron broke his back,
he went to the urgent care in Thibodaux and reconnected.
We texted and kept in touch and then, just like times before,
he pulled away once again and we lost touch.
Imagine the shock last night when I saw his daughter,
Hillary's Facebook message that her Dad had died.
Let me tell you here, what this man, this doctor was,
in the years of the new millennium.
I was his nurse and he respected me as I, him.
We were a good team, along with all others who worked with us.
He came to our little bayou, beginning his practice with 
another dear friend, Dr. Pitre and soon the people of the bayou
fell in love with him and it was not long before he was
ready for his very own practice. I followed him there
to Golden Meadow and a practice he built.
Loved by his staff, loved by his patients, 
loved by all who worked at LOS.
Like Dr. Pitre, he was personable.
He did not just "Make Rounds"
he visited with the nurses, found out about you, your family.
When in his clinic, he depended lots on me and
his PA, Dwight, believed that a practice was not about 
one doctor but about all the people who made a clinic work.
What I most admired about him was he came to our
little bayou as an open gay man who also had
custody of his four children.
Had put himself through medical school while raising
four children. I fell in love with the whole family.
Our families intertwined, we did things together
and he and I, a few times had our differences, had our
arguments but we always worked it out.
Then when BB had his drug issues and we left the bayou
I left his practice and I cried like a baby.
He and Dwight, we all cried together.
Once BB was ready for treatment, it was Hutch
who did all the doctor work to get him where he needed to 
be sober. After BB was sober 6 months, it was Dr. Hutch letter
that had TOPS reinstate him as a student with a TOPS scholarship.
The thing I want all to know is, he did not do this just for us,
because we were friends, he did this as a normalcy for his
practice. Once I left, he fell into some bad times, some things
that is not my business to discuss, the issues caused him to 
leave our little bayou and make his way to Denver.
He had his life back together and when Ron was ill,
and I saw his face at that Urgent Care I cried.
I cried because he looked so good, I cried because
I knew he would get Ron what he needed, he would listen
to where Ron was and needed to be.
There are just not enough words to describe what a man he was.
Now he leaves behind his four grown children,
Tiffany, Ryan, Hillary, and Ben.
He leaves behind grandchildren, a mother and a father
and life, this morning, just does not seem fair.
No matter what the causes of his death may be will
not matter in my heart because I know what his heart was.
RIP Troy, and I pray your children may find their way.
I love you!

Monday, October 20, 2014

I hate breakups, love Neil Diamond

A friend of mine is at the Today show so I tune
in to watch, hoping to see her and her hubby.
What I get to see is one of my favorite singer,
Neil Diamond. I swear I must have something for older
men because he looks so sexy in his black suit 
singing love songs to the crowds.
I love me some Neil then he sings this one
and it is just a tad too close to home for this


Something Blue Lyrics

I came with a little bit of sorrow
Was maybe a bit too sad
But one day rolled into tomorrow
And you gave me the best you had
That's how we started together
And how together we're gonna stay

You taught me a little 'bout good times
I fought through a little bit of rain
You brought me a part of your sunshine
You took in the heart of my pain
It wasn't supposed to happen
But then you happened to come my way

Every night, every day 
Every word that you say made it so
Every thought that I had
Said I ought to be glad. Now I know

You showed what a little bit of love can do
You opened my eyes and a light came through
Took me to a place that I never knew
Goodbye to my little bit of something blue

You came and you found me wanting
And I'm saying that I'm in your debt
Some days were a little bit daunting
Some days I'd rather forget
You changed my life for the better
And I know I'd better be good to you

Every word that you say made it so
Every thought that I had

You showed what a little bit of love can do
You opened my eyes and a light came through
Took me to a place that I never knew
So long to my little bit of something blue

It wasn't supposed to happen
But then you happened to come my way

Every night, every day 
Every word that you say made it so
Every thought that I had
Said I ought to be glad. Now I know

You showed what a little bit of love can do
You opened my eyes and a light came through
Took me to a place that I never knew
Goodbye to my little bit of something blue

Farewell to my little bit of something blue.

Going through break ups suck, big time.
Then I have to hear one of my favorite men sing
this song, and I hope that, for a little while,
I brought some of this to this person.
Time will tell what happens but the cliche'
Sadly taking this breakup harder than the end
of my thirty year marriage.
Better today, so no one panic out there,
just this song, got me going this am….

Friday, October 17, 2014


Twenty five years ago on this wonderful
and beautiful day, I gave natural birth to the 
most precious little girl. 
She was easy to deliver and after only one and a half 
hours she was born and I was smitten.
Since that day she has remained one to the
beat of her own drum, so different from every other
Riera/Collins and admired by many for those very
same differences.
Last night was her birthday night celebration.
BB was working and so was her Daddy
but her Nannie was here, Kd came with the babies
and Kayshara, shara her love, was also here to celebrate.
Being eclectic as she is, no cake for her,
so I, her Mommy, baked chocolate chip oatmeal cookies
and cooked her meal request,
Chicken Fricasse'.
It had been a while since we gathered for a celebration
and it was a needed one for this Momma.
Of course she received her traditional money from
myself, but also a sweet Puppy surprise.
Long story to this stuffed animal toy that I just had to buy.
When gypsy was a baby, she has a woobie,
a blankie my Mommy had made for her that went
everywhere with her and her Nannie had
also bought her a Kitten surprise,
it had a velcro stomach and you had to open the belly
to see how many babies you had gotten.
Gypsy did not like it for the babies,
she liked it for the long and fluffy tail that she would
rub against her nose and lips as she sucked those
fingers any chance she got.
Last night we reminisced about that nasty cat tail
and how her Nannie would wash it when she would
go spend the night with her. How sad she would be
when that tail was washed of the smells she loved.
I swear this girl was not happier than she was opening up
that Puppy surprise last night.
I watched her a few times during her little birthday gathering
and just like always, I saw the little deob (devil in french)
she could be at times. I saw my baby with long flowing
blonde curls and deep dimples, deep enough to hold at least
a teaspoon of water. She was a beauty and now, now,
such a beautiful woman, remains eclectic, to the
beat of her own drum and the things that makes me most
proud of her are also the things that can make a momma
crazy. I love you little girl, more than the moon and the stars,
more than you love that woobie you still keep close by.
Yes, you are 25 but always, always in my heart that little 
baby. I will forever be your rock that you can come
to. I thank you so much for all you have done to help me
in the last months, listening to my crying, being happy when
I was happy, giving advice as though you were the Momma 
and I, the child. I will forever be grateful for the birthdays
of your growing years, when I let you skip school and
I skipped work and we made an adventure day, doing
whatever you wanted. Boy, did we find ourselves in some
awesome places when we just got in the car and drove.
I have been blessed with the best daughter in the world.
Often, people have asked why I only had two children.
There was a time that I wanted more but the thought 
of having another little girl scared me, because I knew
no other could ever compare to the girl you are.
I love you, sweet Jesi, 
forever and always!

 ( all say we look so much alike, in this picture, I agree)

 Her and her Nannie who spoiled her rotten
First birthday party.
Will post more pics later when I download those from
last night. 

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Catch up..

So sorry to say,
Mrs. DaDa Martin has passed away.
I will ask all my peeps who follow me here,
pray for the entire family as this loss
is as big as us loosing our dear Mommee.

Wednesday, October 15, 2014


Took a break from my scrap jobs to visit
many on the road to DTB known as down the bayou,
or for me, Home.
You are never too old to learn, ya know…
Since I left on Thursday, I have learned:
1) It is true, you can take the girl off the bayou,
but you can't take the bayou out of the girl.
2) When you visit a stadium that you once called
you own high school, many memories will flood back
and you will feel like you belong there.
3) When your high school team wins, you will be excited.
4) You can never be more proud of the children you have
watched grow up when they dance on the Tarponette team,
play and march in the SL band, or on the sidelines to help 
the injured. It will not make you feel old, it will make you 
feel proud that you are in their village.
5) When you see old friend, neighbors and they run
to you, knowing they are just as excited to see you as you
are to see them.
6) You cannot visit enough people from Thursday to Sunday
and you know the next visit, will have to add a few different people.
7) People who truly love you, will understand why you
may have been incognito and love you just the same.
8) You can never have enough children in your life.
9) As hard as it may be to pack and sleep in a different bed
for 4 nights, it is all worth it.
10) When coming home, it is very nice to have a
friend at the half way mark, Thibby, that you can
spend time with and enjoy it.
11) That even though the visit was great, I am so glad I did
it, coming home to my little grand girls reminds me
just where I need to be, here in P town.
12) Nothing greater than after a 4 day small vacation
to my home town, when I get to baby boys house,
Bean runs to me, hugs me, and says,
"Mumsie I missed you, play with me"
and I know, without a doubt, that the bayou will always
be what I call home but this place, is where I want
to be as a Mumsie. 
I am so privileged that I have these two little grand girls
to watch grow up just like all the young adults I visited
with over the weekend who have grown so fast.

Thursday, October 9, 2014

the kind of love you look for.

Alfrances "Dada" Martin.
When talking to a friend the other day,
I was trying to explain what I want in love this 
next time around. Something that takes time
to build but the only way I could explain it was,
"I want to be in a room full of people, and look across
that room and meet the eyes of that person and
feel like we know something no one else does, love"
Even that sentence is hard to understand, although
I know what I mean. Then from Facebook I hear of
an older couple from Golden Meadow, is facing
an illness of the wife.
Ms. Alfrances "Dada" Martin.
Her children post for us all who know and love
this couple, that she is finally stable but still
in ICU and pretty sick. Yet the hardest part
for the children, even with their Mommy so sick
is watching their Daddy's heart break.
This couple have been together over 60 years,
For sure I have only known them as 
Dada and Mr. Martin.
they are imprinted in my childhood just like
my own parents were.
The difference in them and My parents is that
my Mother became a widow young.
This couple have retired and do everything together.
When I was living in Thibodaux I often
would run into this couple at LIns Resturaunt.
Each time, I went in for just a kiss and had to
sit and get them to tell me about all their family.
"Hope is remarried to a fine man" 
"Cornell's son is in a sitcom"
"Debra is dating Billy"
"Lincoln is moving"
Then we caught up on the grandkids.
The things I always admired when I ran into them
!) They always first asked about my Mom and how I was.
2) They always sat near each other, no across the table stuff.
3) If Mrs.DADA had to go to the bathroom, he walked her there.
4) They always spoke of their children and grandchildren like
I knew each of them personally.
I mean, I do , but a few years have passed and I had to
think often but they never missed a beat.
Now it breaks my heart to think of her love sitting
outside of the ICU hoping that his love pulls through
this most complicated situation and also I am sure
his mind thinks that eventually, after so many years
together, their time here on Earth will come to an end.
He will be a lost man if Mrs. DaDa goes first.
Just like us kids were so lost when out Mommy died,
we had a few years with her dementia to get used to
saying goodbye. I pray that this couple that 
is a staple in my lifetime has more time.
More time to go to their home and talk of all those
things that they probably have put off thinking
they would be with each other for ever.
I wish my friend who I was having that conversation with,
knew this down the bayou couple.
Then I could say, that is what I am looking for,
the kind of love that Martin's have…
Prayers for Mrs. Dada, she is still very sick
but her granddaughter, Revee and her daughter, Debra
have updated that hopefully she will go to a room today.
That way her love can be with her and I can bet, he will
not leave her side.
If you find that kind of love, treasure it, try to always
see the good in the other and don't let each other make
anything else more important than each other.

Tuesday, October 7, 2014


Yesterday, I took a break from Christmas boxes
to make a frame that has been ordered for a while
by one of my young friends, Shawn.
She lost her Popee months ago and from her
posts on faceboook, I could tell she is feeling
very lonesome right now.
Time to give her some loving from her Popee.
So, I awakened early and started by praying,
the way I start all my mornings.
This morning I prayed that Popee could guide my hands.
I always ask for some information about the one
I am making the frame about.
Shawn shared that he loved gardening and working
on his boat. He was a WW II veteran (Like my daddy)
and had the most beautiful blue eyes.
I go upstairs and start pulling papers and ephemera to use.
I want to use a certain paper to cover the frame,
yet I keep coming back to another that has musical
lines on it. The paper is a tad feminine but the part
I would use would not show, still I didn't want 
to use that paper. Yet, each time I put up the paper
I wanted to use, I just could not cut it.
Finally I send Shawn a text,
"Did your grandpa like music?"
Then I explain what is happening.
"Yes, he loved music and he was a stubborn old man…"
Well that does it, I use the paper this Popee wants
me to use. Shawn and I text a little through the day
and the more she shares with me, the more I feel like
he is guiding me. I know this sounds spooky but
It's how it happens. I want to make my frames things
you will not buy at a store, too personal.
I finished the frame and I must say it is beautiful.
Not sharing photos here because I want to surprise Shawn 
and will deliver it to her on Thursday.
I guess I should thank her Popee because most of the
ideas were his…lol.
Sweet Shawn and her love, Cru.
So strange to have watched these kids grow since they were
little children and now they are all grown up and awesome adults!

Monday, October 6, 2014


If you watch football, you have at least
heard of the Bengals player whose little girl
is fighting cancer. 
This morning I turn on the television to watch
Hoda talk about a commercial she helped make
about childhood cancer. She speaks of, how ironically,
when number 75 of the Bengals little girl was chosen
for the casting no one realized it 
"was the football players little girl"
I was intrigued to watch the story.
What a brave little girl, but there is also
so much more to this story.
The story about a football team called the Bengals.
I am sure most teams would do some of the
same things and maybe have and have not gotten
the recognition, but today, the Bengals get the
thumbs up.
Devon Stills and his daughter Leah,
the light of his life, fighting a battle,
a battle I fought as a child.
Devon spoke of not blaming the Bengals for 
cutting him, he just could not make practice,
could not concentrate and could not
keep himself from the hospital where his precious
daughter was fighting for her life.
But then the Bengals did something completely
unexpected, the offered Devon a spot on their
practice squad. May not sound like a big deal if
you know little about what this means, as I did.
What it did mean was not only would that keep he
and his little girl close together, in the same place
that she was receiving treatment, but offer him
a salary that would keep him sustained through this 
ordeal. Keep him and his family insured so the mounds
of bills could be paid. 
After that, he never left his little girls side.
If you google the story you will definitely learn more
and probably cry a tad if you are like me, sappy.
This child, like all given no choice but to fight
cancer, is a hero. Devon even says how much she has
taught him. She recently has had the cancer removed
but her battle is far from over. as I, she has
many months maybe years of chemotherapy and radiation.
But yesterday, Devon Stills was taken off the reserved list
and entered the field to play with his team, to give
back a little to a team that has rallied around his family.
He entered to every cheerleader wearing his jersey number
he watches the big screen to see his little girl and
the commercial she starred in.
With tears running down his face, he watches
and is overwhelmed with pride.
Pride for his girl, pride for his team.
It did not matter who won that game,
I don't even know who did, because
no matter what the scores said,
the Bengals are the winners.

Saturday, October 4, 2014


 Sweet Natalie Marie Doucet is finally here,
coming in at a whopping 6 pounds 15 ounces!
A little peestoche (peanut)
Her Mommy is doing fine and her Daddy is beaming.
So happy for her grandparents on both sides but
mostly my pals, Sue and Foe who
were always able to have there one son, Scott
and I know they always longed for a sweet baby girl.
All kids are like magnets to Sue so this 
little princess will be no different.
Congrats to you two, Scott and Laurie.
Never forget the love you guys feel for each other right
now, forever. It will get you through some very rough times.
Love to you all.

Friday, October 3, 2014


I am a Christina Aguilera fan.
I think she is beautiful, I think she has a beautiful voice
but she is also is a very smart woman.
Yesterday, while "scrap jobbing"
I was listening to MTV when her video for
BEAUTIFUL came on:

Every day, is so wonderful
And suddenly, it's hard to breathe,
Now and then I get insecure
From all the fame, I'm so ashamed

I am beautiful no matter what they say
Words can't bring me down
I am beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring me down, oh no,
So don't you bring me down today,

To all your friends, you're delirious
So consumed in all your doom
Trying hard to fill the emptiness
The piece is gone and the puzzle undone
That's the way it is

You are beautiful no matter what they say
Words can't bring you down
You are beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring you down, oh no,
So don't you bring me down today...

No matter what we do 
(no matter what we do)
No matter what they say 
(no matter what they say)
When the sun is shining through
Then the clouds won't stay

And everywhere we go 
(everywhere we go)
The sun won't always shine 
(sun won't always shine)
But tomorrow will find a way 
On the other side

Cos' we are beautiful no matter what they say
Yes, words won't bring us down, oh no,
We are beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring us down, oh no,
So don't you bring me down today

Don't you bring me down today
Don't you bring me down today

What beautiful words and the video is perfect 
for those words. I remember being a teen 
and having so many things that I wished I could
change. My kinky hair, my crooked back.
Of course, I didn't share this with anyone, I kept
it inside. Anyone who knew me back then would 
have believed there is nothing I struggled with.
I was a funny, outgoing gal. 
Then I grew up and honestly love myself exactly 
as I am. Age is a beautiful thing.
The older I get the more comfortable I am with me.
I know who I am today.
I wish that for all the children of the world.
They are beautiful. I look at all my nieces and nephew,
my great nieces and nephews, some in their teen years,
and I would want them to know this, these words,
that each and every one of you are beautiful 
and don't let the world bring you down.
OH, they will, the commercials, the actresses who 
have the money for Botox or photoshopping,
it is not what you see outside.
MY back remains crooked and their are rolls where
there was once none. I have wrinkles on my forehead
and between my eyes, probably from fussing too much
when the babies were young. But I still
know for 51, I am beautiful. YEs, I still struggle with
wanting to loose weight, to eat healthy but these days
it is not because I care of how the extra pounds look but
to live a long and healthy life.
It is all about how you carry yourself. I have no doubt that
I am 51 years old. I know I don't act that age. that 
is my choice. Yesterday, I picked up Bean at school 
and she wanted to go to the park. It was hot, Ive had
a cold but you know, grand babies get what they want
when its about the park. While we were there, there
was another little girl her age with her Momma.
Of course, Bean asked,
"Mumsie" can I go play with her, make me a new friend?"
So I explain all those things about strangers but if
she really wants to meet her I will go and
make sure the little girl and her Mommy are okay 
with that. Sure they were, Momma was a tad overweight
and her little girl being Bean's age, she was having trouble
keeping up with her. Eventually we all end up at the swings.
"My Mumsie can push me and then she can swing because
she likes to play." Bean shares with our new friends.

The little girls Mommy asks me if she is my little girl.
"Oh No, I am her Mumsie, her daddy is my son"
"Wow, I thought you were her Momma"
"No she is my Mumsie, silly!" Bean shares with her giggling.
I tell her that I am 51.
"Fifty one!!! Damn, I thought you were the Momma!"
well that can make for a good afternoon,
especially when I am a tad under the weather yesterday.
But it all goes back to the lyrics of Christina's song.
We are all beautiful, no matter what they say,
don't let words bring you down.
You are beautiful…..
It's all about how you feel inside.

( can't end this blog without this beautiful baby who 
I also got to play with yesterday, she definitely is beautiful!)

Thursday, October 2, 2014


The story I heard on CNN news had me livid last night.
When a hospital is so busy that they won't listen the
the history a patient is trying to tell me it makes
me sad to see just how far medicine has grown for the worst.
Let me line up the scenario:
(gotten from CNN website)
People, medical people we need to listen to the patient.
If you cannot understand him, then get and interpreter for 
yourself. Now this man who tried his best to 
stay quarantined as best as he could, has now been 
around millions of Americans many children many elderly 
and just many Americans. We don't need this fear.
Things like this is why I love the small town hospitals
like my dear old "stomping ground" 
Lady of the Sea where patients are still listened to,
where everyone is treated the same and individually.
Where the staff is all family and the patient is the only 
one they care about. Our country is filled with small hospitals
like this that just don't get enough recognition or government
money to stay open. Thankfully our little LOS has
found a way to keep their heads above the water and
give the quality care they always have where the patient
is heard. Hoping the man with Ebola gets well and I pray
that not many will have been exposed in a way we have
a pandemic.
( I also wonder if this is a ploy by Africa to kill us off
but thats a whole other blog…lol)