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Saturday, November 15, 2014

A LETTER TO MY YOUNGER SELF.

Everyone who knows anything about me and
the old blog days, you know how I love me
some Oprah, I mean if I go back I'm guessing
I can find at least 5 posts over the last 6 years
explaining how I know if Oprah knew me, she 
would dump Gail and I would be her bestie....
(Sorry Besties, but I'd let you hang too)
Then she comes out with THE BOOK
WHAT I KNOW FOR SURE
and I am just a tad jealous of my girl.
You see, she wrote the book that I should 
have written. Forever I have had the desire to
write a book and each page I turn I almost
can believe that is me writing it, we believe
so much of the same thing. But really,
her book will definitely get a girl in her
50's thinking. Yesterday, well last night,
I was full of thoughts sparked from Oprah's book
as well as spending time with my Bailey Boo.
All my kiddo's from my elementary school days
are either graduated or in high school and in the
next few years will all go on their way.
You know we have all read how if we could write
a letter to our younger self, what would we say?
I will write it here, write a love letter to my younger 
self in hopes that some of the teens in my life 
will gather what I say and hold it close to their heart...
(MAKING AN ADDENDUM TO THIS POST,
I AM NOT WRITING THIS AS COMPLAINT OF PUTTING
MYSELF DOWN FOR THE DECISIONS I HAVE MADE
IN MY LIFE. I WOULD NOT CHANGE ANYTHING
AND WOULD STILL MARRY MY EX, HAVE MY KIDDO'S
BECAUSE THEY HAVE BROUGHT ME THE MOST PLEASURE
OF MY LIFE. I WROTE THIS BLOG BECAUSE WE
ALL OFTEN SAY, ' IF I KNEW THEN WHAT I KNOW NOW
I WOULD HAVE MADE DIFFERENT TEENAGE DECISIONS.
SO AFTER A WEEK OF SPEAKING WITH MANY TEENS
AND THEIR PARENTS, I WANTED TO WRITE A
LETTER TO MY YOUNGER SELF SO TO HELP
THOSE YOUNG ONES I LOVE SO MUCH)
1) Puppy love is just that, new love that
sparks all those things in you that have 
you believing this is the one for you forever.
I fell in love with mines, he was my only
for most of my life... Now we are divorcing.
Don't let your first love be your only one.
2) Hold your virginity tightly and close to you.
Once it's gone we can't get it back. 
For me, I had sex for the wrong reasons,
to keep a boyfriend, yeah he became my husband
but I still gave something that I cherished away 
because he wanted to, not because I wanted to.
We are too young at this age, to live through all
the "girl"emotions that go along with sex.
3) Believe me, when you are a teen with a teen boy,
sex will not be fun for you. The kissing, hugging, all
those things you will like, but the actual act, not
many teens I know like the actual act AND if
you are with a boy in your age range, he is selfish.
He won't last very long and he won't know what to
do with you once he has gotten what he wants.
4) All teen boys, even though they truly believe
they love you, once you have sex with them, they
will want you to do it often. Gone will be the innocent
days of just holding hands, walking and flirting.
5) If you find yourself giving in the grown up Sex thing
as a teen then you have to be prepared to act like
an adult. Which means you have to do what you have to do
to protect yourself, never, ever, trust your love to 
protect you. Have your own stash of condoms even
if you are on some form of birth control.
6) No babies are mistakes, they are all blessings but The Big Man
did not make for children to have children.
If you are old enough to have sex, then you have to brave
enough to go to your parents and talk.
7) If you decide to have the grown up thing called
"Making love" which is really just sex,
then be grown up to speak to your parents, at least 
your Mommy. 
8) Your parents love you unconditionally, after they scream,
cry, etc. over the teen things you may do, in the end,
they love you anyway, unconditionally, go to them.
If you need to jump in their lap, the same one that
used to bring you comfort when your life was simple,
then do it. They will not turn you away. If they do,
then it is they, not you, who may need counseling.
9) You, as a teen, will roll you eyes, talk back to your 
Mom, hurt her in ways you don't even know and then
you will grow up and one day hold your own baby in
your arms and you will cry for many reasons but one of
the main reasons will be because you were so mean and 
selfish as a teen. 
10) Even after this realization those same parents?
they still love you unconditionally.
11) Be a kid for as long as you can. Right now,
all your bills are paid by those people you call your parentals.
You have no worries of a job, bills, etc. someone else
has those worries, so don't grow up so fast because,
believe me, once you do, you will long for the day
you wake up on a Saturday at 1pm, to a breakfast
consisting of whatever you put in as your order,
and your Mommy will cook it. When you grow up,
you will be the short order cook and be cooking
on one of your only two days off of the week.
12) At least twice a year, Christmas and on your own 
birthday, write your parents a love letter, let them know
what they mean to you, that even though you are
a typical selfish teen, you love them. Thank them
for the gift of life and always being there for you.
Believe me, they will treasure those letters forever....
13)Remember what you do, what you say, on social media
does not go away, it lives on somewhere in that world of 
iCloud so don't put nothing out there that your adult self
cannot answer to when you go in for the job you want.
You don't want to go for the dream job you want and
are most comfortable with and be looked over to 
someone who can't do the job half as good as you 
but has no "skeletons that can be pulled up on social media."
14) Allow yourself to grow and mature slowly, like
the old Oak trees, they start of young and bendable
to grow slowly into one of the strongest most
beautiful trees in the world. That is you, 
live and answer to yourself, let no one change or talk
you out of what you know, in your heart, to be true.
I could go on forever, but going to stop here...
lots to think about as I close a letter to my younger self.





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