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Monday, February 9, 2015

SELF ESTEEM, NEVER ENOUGH..


EARLY THIS MORNING I AM UP.
AS I SURF THE NET I COME ACROSS THIS QUOTE.
I DON'T KNOW WHO ALVIN PRICE IS,
BUT I HAVE FIRST HAND KNOWLEDGE OF HOW
THIS SENTENCE, THE STATEMENT WORKS.
  I AM SURE I MAY HAVE BLOGGED THIS STORY 
BEFORE OVER THE MANY YEARS OF WRITING
YET IT IS STILL WONDERFUL ENOUGH TO REPEAT.
HAVING BEEN A CHILD WITH CANCER,
BEFORE INTERNET, FACEBOOK, BEFORE MAKE A WISH,
I WAS TEASED BECAUSE OF MY HAIR.
FIRST I WAS BALD, THEN MY HAIR GREW IN 
STRINGY AND CURLY, UG U LEE!
I WAS TEASED BUT I NEVER ONCE, LET
THOSE PEERS, EVEN SOME FRIENDS SEE ME CRY.
I WAS YOUNG, FIRST, SECOND, THIRD GRADES.
I LAUGHED ALONG WITH THEM BUT INSIDE,
I WAS DYING, SO EMBARRASSED.
AS I WALKED FROM THE BUS DOWN DURSETTE STREET,
I STILL HELD IN MY TEARS.
I WOULD THEN WALK INTO MY BIG, OLD HOME
AND THERE MY DADDY SAT, EITHER MAKING
A CAST NET THAT HE MADE FROM SCRATCH,
OR COOKING US A WONDERFUL MEAL, ALSO
FROM SCRATCH. 
THEN, THEN I WOULD LET MY TEARS FALL.
MY DADDY WAS NOT ONE TO CODDLE OR HOLD CLOSE
TO HIS HEART WHEN ONE OF HIS LITTLE GIRLS WERE SAD.
NO INSTEAD, HE GAVE WORDS OF WISDOM THAT MAY
HAVE BEEN TOO DEEP FOR MOST ELEMENTARY CHILDREN.
I GOT IT, I UNDERSTOOD HIS MESSAGE,
" LILLY, IT DOES NOT MATTER WHAT THE WORLD
OUT THERE THINGS OF YOU, WHEN YOU ENTER THIS
HOUSE YOU ARE LOVED."
THAT ONE GESTURE OF LOVE GOT ME THROUGH MANY 
HARD TIMES IN MY LIFE AS I KNEW IT WAS TRUE.
NOT ONE PERSON IN THAT HOME DID NOT
LOVE ME OR HAVE MY BACK.
IT IS SAID THAT FOR EVERY NEGATIVE THING YOU TELL
A CHILD, IT TAKE A THOUSAND POSITIVE ONES
TO TURN THAT BELIEVE AROUND"
MY DADDY, HE DIDN'T KNOW THAT, HE JUST
KNEW THAT HIS BABY GIRL WAS HURTING AND HE HAD
TO SAY SOMETHING. 
I STILL CHALK UP MY INDEPENDENCE ON THAT ONE STATEMENT.
I HAVE MORE SELF ESTEEM THAN MOST AND AGAIN,
I AM SURE IT WAS THE COMBINATION OF MANY THINGS
IN MY LIFE THAT GAVE ME THAT,
BUT MY DADDY, WELL HIS STATEMENT HAS NEVER, EVER
LEFT MY MIND OR HEART.

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