Tuesday, April 9, 2013
A memoir in the making, a pink dress, and more...
Today, I brought HOBL to airport and today, I leave to spend my
three days, two nights with our dear Mommy.
I know my blogging has been slow as well as my writings
not really up to par. I apologize to my followers for that.
It's like I have tried to explain, life seems like it is on standstill
when you have someone you love who is slowly dying.
Today, as I have gathered and added here a few pictures
from times before with the siblings and mommy, sadly they
are all after brother, Larry had passed so he is missing from all.
When Mommy got really sick and we realized that hospice
would be needed as there is nothing else that can be done
for her ailing health, I had began to write down medications I had given
to keep whoever was coming to pass on what was given on my time there.
i had just put it on a sticky note but C, being the
business mind of the gang, bought a steno notebook and
we began to keep notes in there to share the updates,
things that may be important to the ones following behind us.
This steno notebook has now grown into a big faith journal.
It has also become so much more.
As we began to write important messages, we also began to
write stories of our time spent there.
Things Mommy says to us, things that happen at the Manor
on our watch, funny stories of Mommy and others who
we now share our lives with.
It is one of the first things us sisters want to do when
we get to Mommy's house, read all that has happened while we were gone.
There are all the medications she has needed, also
a timeline of how much she has gotten weaker and sicker,
how she is pulling away which is normal in those who know
there time on this Earth are getting shorter.
But it is also, so, so much more.
These journals are filled with stories, our thoughts, our wishes,
I am so proud of the sisters, as I am usually the writer,
the blogger, the mushy one. Yet, in these books are
their thoughts, their soul, their love for our Mommy.
I laugh out loud when reading some of the antics that
go on while I am out. I cry when I read their love for our
Mommy. I pray that one day soon, brother will have something
written in this book, as I know he has lots to share with us all.
We have grown closer, through this "changing of the guards"
we have all committed to, fulfilling our promise to our Mommy
That, one, she will not suffer and two, that
she will not die alone. I am so proud that so far, we
have been able to keep these promises to her.
Lately, she has spoken of brother Larry, how
she would like to go to Texas one more time before she
dies, she asks about brother Peter often.
We have also shared in the journal mom's insistent need for
a new dress. She is so small now, weighing a mere 105,
she not only has much clothing that no longer fits, but she
also has not one dress that fits her.
She forgets so much but each time she speaks of the dress
and what color, she mentions that it is for Arthur and Amanda's
wedding. She remembers always that this event is coming
and uses that reason for wanting a new dress.
A few weeks ago, friend Alli, brought Mommy the
most beautiful roses in this peachy/pink color.
She wants a dress that color.
Sometimes we believe she is going to hang on until
November to attend this wedding and other times
we believe that subconsciously she is asking for a new
dress to be buried in. A beautiful pink dress,
the color she looks the best in.
We cannot fulfill the promise to take her to Texas,
but we can fulfill her wishes for a new dress.
C had a great idea, buying a few that she may like at Stage,
bringing them to the manor for try- ons and returning all the
ones except the one she chooses.
It will be the dress she sports to the A&A wedding and/or
it will be the dress she wears to her final resting place.
Although, she has always joked with us that she came into the
world naked and wants to go out the same way, to bury
her nude, we know she would prefer a pretty pink dress.
Love to all!