Friday, May 10, 2013

one of those days...

Today will be one of those days, just like Sunday will be.
It will be one of those days that the realization of loosing 
my Mommy comes full force.
I know I have to move on, I know I cannot spend the rest 
of my life "feeling sorry for myself"
I am not that kind. I am not a martyr, I am a hopeless optimistic.
Even knowing all of this, even feeling better as the days
pass before me about the loss, I will continue to have
those milestones that the great loss of my Mommy is first in my mind and heart.
Someone told me after two weeks of the loss,
that I can't continue to go around moping.
I knew this was true but I also felt sad.
I thought, if I died, would my children and those that
love me be "well" after two weeks?
I would hope that the loss of me would linger past two weeks.
Putting all this aside, today will be a hard one but also
a beautiful one as my siblings and I will meet in Thibodaux
to go through Mom's jewelry and write thank you cards.
We had to put it off for a few weeks because of vacations
some of us had planned and I know, although we are so 
excited to all be together again for the first time
since Mommy left us, we also know this is and end
to another chapter, something we have to do to move on.
Sunday is also Mothers Day, a day in our family growing up
that never got ignored. My Daddy always bought
Mommy a gift until the kids were old enough to buy it
for him. He never used that saying some husbands do,
"You not my Mother"
He, instead, always honored her as the Mother of his children,
a thank you for all she did for us, for his children.
Yep, my dad was no romantic and if you only knew him  in 
his older sicker years, you would never believe he did this 
but he did. Just like each morning when he served her 
coffee in bed.
I wish I could just sleep the day away.
Gypsy baby is working and I know Kd and BB
will be spending the day with their own little family.
We will gather here on Monday for gypsy and kelmiester's
favorite meal, chicken fricassee' (stew to most of you)
we will play games or make a puzzle or play a game
but regardless, I am hoping for an evening with all my babies.
Sunday, wish I could just take it off the calendar.
Wow, long winded this morning,
Needing extra strength, extra pain management,
needing my sisters today.
Forgive me if I ran on and on today, but 
I gain comfort when I put it down and share it with others.
If you are blessed with a mother, give her extra hugs
this Mothers day. Don't just give her a gift, rather
write her a love letter, enclose all that is good in her,
all that makes her special to you, the appreciation for all
she does for you. Do not take her for granted, not Sunday not any day.
I can attest that there is no Mother out there that would 
rather a love note than a gift.


  1. Lil, praying for you and your sisters. Love you!!!

  2. It was a beautiful afternoon, spent with my sisters, first time since mommy died. It was not hard as I thought as anytime I am with my sisters I am happy. It was a great day, today, I miss my siblings.