Saturday, May 18, 2013

the mind is a funny thing, as is the heart.

Yesterday, after a most perfect day playing with this cutie,
I head to some lost time at Wally World.
On the way home I note an old trailer in the distance.
Then the mind, it takes over.
I acknowledge that the trailer is similar to the
trailer HOBL and I bought and lived in when we
were first married. I loved that trailer, loved it!
This one is disheveled, but the end of one side was once
a window of walls much like the one we had.
I am brought back to a different time.
A time when although my dad had recently died,
I was in love and marrying my high school sweetheart.
It was not known yet that he had a drug problem so
we were just happy. Happy that we were about to commit
"for better or worse"
"till death do us part"
We were happy that we were able to purchase not only
a piece of property but a beautiful new home.
I loved that home, I know I said it already...
It was not long after Baby boy was born and Juan took
our first home from us. We moved into a small home that 
we renovated down Melo's lane, sold the trailer and
the land. In the new home, it is there, that HOBL decided
he needed drug rehab. and some really bad memories 
are in the memories of that second home.
Back to the first, I begin to get "melancholy"
about the first home. We were not perfect, we had lots
of arguments but it also holds some of our best memories.
I had never lived in such a beautiful space. 
We worked hard while living there, fought some
and loved even harder. I wish for just a short time
to go back to that time.
The times when we found out we were going to be parents.
The times that we both worked nights, I would drive to 
Golden Meadow to pick him up at work and we would
spend most of the day in bed, sleeping, talking, and.....
you got it.
ahhhhh funny what time does to old memories,
dulls the bad ones, and highlights all the good ones.
It is those wonderful, good memories that will get you
through some of the roughest times of your life.

1 comment:

  1. Yes, good memories are the best and you're in it for better or for worse. You remember the good ones and your life gets better in some ways. Praying for you; I know this is a very tough time. Hopefully Jilly will be home soon to help.