Wednesday, May 30, 2012

I can balance this new life after all

Yesterday was the gathering of friends and family in Plaquemine.
I loved every minute of it and remembered just how much
I love preparing and then visiting with people.
Some were meeting for the first time, others
were remembering just how their pasts had crossed.
It was fantastic.
Today, Bean and I are heading to Thiby for the second
Wednesday in a row as I have chosen Wednesdays 
as my "spend time with mommy day"
I also set up visits with some of my Thiby friends.
Going to have lunch with two of my young scrap pals,
Katie the neighbor and Meg.
Then heading to Amanda's house to visit with her
new little Taylor where other TES friends will also come to visit.
I am feeling the balance of this new life being
that I might actually not only take the time to visit friends
more than I did when living in Thiby.
Even better, that some Wednesdays I will get to bring Bean
so those friends will get to know her better than had I not moved.
Especially my mommy.
It is important to me that Bean has memory of my Mommy.
She hasn't seen her many times that her little memory would
know yet how important she is to our family 
but she does. At Lil's birthday party she went right up
to her, put her hands on her lap, smiled and sighed this
long sigh almost like saying,
"There you are"
it touched me. Later, some of my family followed us
to my home and Mommy was sitting down being really quiet
and every once in a while Bean would just go up the her and
put her hands in her lap so as to get her attention
making sure mommee knew she was there.
I don't know how much longer Mommy will be with us
so I want Bean to know about the great grandmother who was so 
much of her DeDa's life because she was.
For 11 years of his growing up life,
baby boy and gypsy baby had the privilage of living with her,
and although having her there was not always the best situation for 
my marriage, there was never one day that I thought it was not 
the best situation for my children.
They learned what extended family meant.
They never had to come home to an empty house for Mommy
always made sure, no matter what she was doing, by the
time one of the babies came off that bus, she was there
if I was not. Not only was she there but she had snacks or food 
prepared for them. When we moved to Thiby her little
apartment became a place for BB to sleep one the days
he knew he  needed to go there to find a day or two of
caring or sobriety. Gypsy baby went there often to hang with
her dtb friends and her then boyfriend, Chase.
Yes, it is important to me that Bean continues the feeling 
that this woman is special in her life because she was special 
in her Dee's life.
All is good in the life of balance.

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